jaredjeffries.bsky.social
@jaredjeffries.bsky.social
Gonna start telling people I have my own show on MGM+, because how are they going to prove me wrong?
July 18, 2025 at 5:54 AM
Gonna start telling people I have my own show on MGM+, because how are they going to prove me wrong?
That new Naked Gun movie better have like 3 scenes where there's a sign that says "dressing room" but it's a room full of salad dressing or some shit. Hell yeah.
June 10, 2025 at 5:37 AM
That new Naked Gun movie better have like 3 scenes where there's a sign that says "dressing room" but it's a room full of salad dressing or some shit. Hell yeah.
It must be incredibly hard working at a trailer editing house, taking all these different movies and somehow managing to editing each of them into the exact same trailer.
May 25, 2025 at 6:32 PM
It must be incredibly hard working at a trailer editing house, taking all these different movies and somehow managing to editing each of them into the exact same trailer.
You don't even need They Live glasses anymore.
April 1, 2025 at 10:30 PM
You don't even need They Live glasses anymore.
On one hand, I'm glad there is less shame in our society.
On the other hand, I'm waiting for this guy to wrap up the business meeting he's conducting on speakerphone so I too can use the toilet at Ikea.
On the other hand, I'm waiting for this guy to wrap up the business meeting he's conducting on speakerphone so I too can use the toilet at Ikea.
April 1, 2025 at 7:11 PM
On one hand, I'm glad there is less shame in our society.
On the other hand, I'm waiting for this guy to wrap up the business meeting he's conducting on speakerphone so I too can use the toilet at Ikea.
On the other hand, I'm waiting for this guy to wrap up the business meeting he's conducting on speakerphone so I too can use the toilet at Ikea.
Every brand in America thinks we love celebrities so much we'll get excited to see them in a commercial even if they make no fucking sense.
February 10, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Every brand in America thinks we love celebrities so much we'll get excited to see them in a commercial even if they make no fucking sense.
A scientist who studies meteors is called a "weatherman."
January 28, 2025 at 9:37 PM
A scientist who studies meteors is called a "weatherman."
A great idea for a horror movie is that somebody turns into something but it's really a metaphor.
January 12, 2025 at 6:41 AM
A great idea for a horror movie is that somebody turns into something but it's really a metaphor.
Maybe it's time I got up off my ass and wrote my hit 2003 coming of age dramedy
December 3, 2024 at 12:43 AM
Maybe it's time I got up off my ass and wrote my hit 2003 coming of age dramedy
What if it turns out Gordon Lightfoot is actually a really fast driver?
September 9, 2024 at 7:17 PM
What if it turns out Gordon Lightfoot is actually a really fast driver?
Inspiring group. Glad Sonny Bono made the top spot.
July 9, 2024 at 11:37 PM
Inspiring group. Glad Sonny Bono made the top spot.
My whole life flashed before my eyes and it turns out I'm the asshole.
April 25, 2024 at 1:14 AM
My whole life flashed before my eyes and it turns out I'm the asshole.
Whenever you meet a new dog, the first thing to do is find out whether its name is Luna or Coco.
March 22, 2024 at 12:53 AM
Whenever you meet a new dog, the first thing to do is find out whether its name is Luna or Coco.
Movie streaming service search bars should have a button to automatically type "American" before the shitty title.
March 12, 2024 at 5:13 PM
Movie streaming service search bars should have a button to automatically type "American" before the shitty title.
I don't like to brag, but I have been personally selected to apply for the Venmo Mastercard.
January 3, 2024 at 8:46 PM
I don't like to brag, but I have been personally selected to apply for the Venmo Mastercard.