Jake Turk
@jaketurk1971.bsky.social
Surviving the Turd Reich. Remember due process? Wasn't that shit AWESOME? Oh well. Half the country finds politics "boring", so they elected a barely literate TV star to "shake things up." He handed the keys to the most thin-skinned sumbitch alive.
"As all of you can clearly see, I'm the love child of Leonard Nimoy and Anthony Perkins."
November 26, 2025 at 6:27 AM
"As all of you can clearly see, I'm the love child of Leonard Nimoy and Anthony Perkins."
"The People's Central Air Defense Headquarters. Where is that, Dmitri? In Omsk. Right. Yes. "
November 19, 2025 at 5:26 AM
"The People's Central Air Defense Headquarters. Where is that, Dmitri? In Omsk. Right. Yes. "
Jesus H. Christ, are you still burdened by stubborn residual faith in humanity's potential to improve itself? Poor schmuck. Fortunately, a quick and easy fix is the comment section at any Gizmodo article.
October 28, 2025 at 4:29 PM
Jesus H. Christ, are you still burdened by stubborn residual faith in humanity's potential to improve itself? Poor schmuck. Fortunately, a quick and easy fix is the comment section at any Gizmodo article.
Lol. In the opening credits for James Whale's Frankenstein, the author is credited as "Mrs Percy B Shelley."
October 23, 2025 at 6:17 PM
Lol. In the opening credits for James Whale's Frankenstein, the author is credited as "Mrs Percy B Shelley."
Lol. The Pakled still has to pay $1.5 billion. "We are Pakleds. Our ship is the MAGA. It is broken."
October 14, 2025 at 3:14 PM
Lol. The Pakled still has to pay $1.5 billion. "We are Pakleds. Our ship is the MAGA. It is broken."
"He's got dead eyes, lifeless eyes, like a doll's eyes."
October 13, 2025 at 7:01 PM
"He's got dead eyes, lifeless eyes, like a doll's eyes."
An actual Italian-American whose life story was an almost maudlin rendition of the rags-to-riches American Dream.
October 13, 2025 at 6:54 PM
An actual Italian-American whose life story was an almost maudlin rendition of the rags-to-riches American Dream.
Somewhere, some hardcore Frank Herbert fan has a Gowachin cosplay suit. The Portland protests are the opportunity they've been waiting for.
October 10, 2025 at 1:35 PM
Somewhere, some hardcore Frank Herbert fan has a Gowachin cosplay suit. The Portland protests are the opportunity they've been waiting for.
Appropriate quote from one of my favorite movies, assuming Shitler doesn't get his wish.
October 9, 2025 at 7:42 PM
Appropriate quote from one of my favorite movies, assuming Shitler doesn't get his wish.
Shitler, Eva Blondie, Inhuman, Brainworm, etc...
September 22, 2025 at 10:53 PM
Shitler, Eva Blondie, Inhuman, Brainworm, etc...
Brainworm has a real William Windom from Original Trek vibe.
September 6, 2025 at 3:31 AM
Brainworm has a real William Windom from Original Trek vibe.
This is a charming folksy sentiment. Too bad it's bullshit. MAGA aren't victims. They chose him, knowing his "jobs & Jesus" BS was just that. They'll help him shoot themselves in the feet as long as they believe he'll shoot us in the face. MAGA hate us > they love themselves. Sorry 4 the buzzkill.
August 30, 2025 at 7:08 PM
This is a charming folksy sentiment. Too bad it's bullshit. MAGA aren't victims. They chose him, knowing his "jobs & Jesus" BS was just that. They'll help him shoot themselves in the feet as long as they believe he'll shoot us in the face. MAGA hate us > they love themselves. Sorry 4 the buzzkill.
Make sure you don't live in a blue city where violent crime is plummeting, or else Shitler will send in troops to "restore order." JFC America is the joke of the world now.
August 11, 2025 at 4:48 PM
Make sure you don't live in a blue city where violent crime is plummeting, or else Shitler will send in troops to "restore order." JFC America is the joke of the world now.
Ivan Groznyy: the half gram of acetaminophen I take every morning for various aches and pains.
Tsarevich Ivan: my liver.
Tsarevich Ivan: my liver.
July 23, 2025 at 3:57 AM
Ivan Groznyy: the half gram of acetaminophen I take every morning for various aches and pains.
Tsarevich Ivan: my liver.
Tsarevich Ivan: my liver.
A happy BAYONETS!! day to all who observe.
July 2, 2025 at 9:50 PM
A happy BAYONETS!! day to all who observe.
ICE=The United States Police Force (from John Carpenter's Escape from New York)
July 1, 2025 at 4:46 PM
ICE=The United States Police Force (from John Carpenter's Escape from New York)
But remember. Don't call them white trash. That's cruel.
June 16, 2025 at 3:34 AM
But remember. Don't call them white trash. That's cruel.
This is Christianity. Not the few thousand hippie Christians. They are too few and too weak to save us from Authentic Christians like Trump, Lee, & Mikey Johnson. Worse, the hippie Christians are cowards too afraid to admit that the cult they were raised in is fundamentally irredeemable.
June 15, 2025 at 10:40 PM
This is Christianity. Not the few thousand hippie Christians. They are too few and too weak to save us from Authentic Christians like Trump, Lee, & Mikey Johnson. Worse, the hippie Christians are cowards too afraid to admit that the cult they were raised in is fundamentally irredeemable.