Or, even worse, I have to hide those pieces of my life from someone who I’m getting to know. I just want to feel like I’m romantically involved with someone who makes me feel secure for once.

I want to feel understood and secure in a woman’s relationship with me, and even after building up all this confidence I’m worried it’s not enough, that someone will see just how scared and insecure I am where my life is and not even ask for a second date because I asked them to drive to me.

I worry I’ll be forced to give up that friendship and leave her without anyone to call a close friend. Or I meet another person like my ex and I’ll be too infatuated to realize until its too late. I also keep thinking that I’ve never known romantic love in any sense on the way I truly feel comfort.

And most of all, I have people I want to keep in contact with if I do meet someone, like a girl who both of us have confessed to each other but long distance means neither of us want to pursue it, but she’s still a close friend.

I’m stopped by a number of factors though, like my life isn’t together in the way that looks good to slot a person into it long term (no way to drive, live with parents, ptsd/anxiety/autism/chronic pain combo)

I have been having the intrusive thought of signing up for the serious relationship dating sites. I don’t think I know how to meet women any other way at this point.

Its a mediocre rough draft of a much better game, uses the worst writing trope within the back half of its story, gameplay is tedious, characters outside of one are poorly written and executed, and its environments are muddy.