I often admire the effort that the little bugs in my kitchen make to save themselves as I come after them with a paper towel. I usually get them in the end, but I salute a worthy adversary as I drop their little corpse in the trash.

I want to read the one that falls exactly in the middle.

I paid half that for my ticket to see
High On Fire next month and I’m confident it will be a better show. I also expect to be a little closer to God by the end

Hottest room in Hell for these evil bastards

People who lean hard into the alt tags are the best people

Solid proof that you’re raising him right

I want this movie playing on a repeating loop at my funeral

The flower really pulls the whole composition together

The best part about this is how much that photo looks like Guy from Fugazi

A family friend, upon seeing the giant beehive hairdo of our waitress at Dennys, shouted “Great Jesus Bunsuck!” That will be an essential phrase for me until my dying day

Some part of my soul will be watching last night’s game for the rest of eternity. The space time continuum was shattered and it is currently the 1,239th inning.

Totally not a metaphor