i literally look deformed ?????? ive never seen anyone who looks lik eme????? my stomach completely folds over on one side but not the other?????/ its so fucking big compared to the rest of my proportions i dont get it why am i shaped like that.

t*ktok shop

the white one is less spicy but more citrusy...

the "bold" one is more spicy but closer to takis flavor

but the white one is still close enough to mimic that flavor omg im going crazy i love this sm

its so miserable to know im destroying myself with sugar and i feel so out of control like i cant even stop even though i know my health is in danger

i would but i feel like i would block you and then disappear out of embarrassment if i couldnt get back on track and i dont want to do that 😭

i think imight be prediabetic again or developing t2..... cuz i just cant help myself with sugar. im hungry often and now the past few days ive been sleeping so much like im never awake. many other symptoms idk hoping my doc will put me on wl meds if i go see her though. dont want my blood drawn :(

so i ate a ton of sugar last night and def regretting it but Man it was a hard night. my cat is ok tho he’s in recovery now at the hospital

i enjoy it. and then i eat too much.

idk wat to do either about all this. i dont want to put low cal shit on him. like if i make dinner... i want to feed tf out of him. i love getting food for him. and eating with him. but man ive just been eating so much and it sucks

i feel ashamed to even tell you guys this because i feel i should be able to control myself better ....... like i complain all the tiem man why dont i just do something about it!! why am i making myself suffer through binges

omg i also have so many popular songs from this time period that also send me into a panic...... i cant listen to ad*le without wanting to throw up

i dont have money for size inclusive small brands..... i hate that i have to have money to dress the way i want to if im big. i hate companies, i hate society, i hate the way everything is ran, i hate feeling so inferior. i need to get back down to a medium. i miss it so much. i need it.

i felt all my control slipping away from me. i hated going into the store knowing it would be a rare occurence to find anything in the juniors section that would even fit me. waddling over to the plus size section just to see styles only older women would wear... i felt my youth slipping away at 21

honestly ik im big-ish but it baffles me a bit when im humbled by sizing. there are people who are much bigger than me and i feel so bad for them because stores are so fucking terrible with inclusivity. at my highest (which im literally less than 15 lbs away from) i was growing out of the xl size

xl is still a straight size and you cant even stock much of that? im just supposed to look through the smaller sizes and feel the hatred of myself grow? to tearfully envy people who can wear them? i miss being a medium. i miss it so fucking bad. the convenience... the styles... the price point...