I do need a good painter and decorator, if you fancy painting my walls white.
(Again, totally a realistic request and not at all lewd in the slightest)

Yeah. But I'm bored out my mind and I need to do something.

Just search "toilet handle replacement" in amazon, they are less than a tenner.

Oh, it's super easy. You can get the handles at any hardware store, bnq, screw fix etc.. and you basically just need a screwdriver and maybe an adjustable wrench.

Handled are like £20 up depending but you can get a kit which has everything you will need.

Well. That entirely depends on what kind of story you are looking for. :3

Do you just want a chat?, an actual story?, or inspiration for something?