sex drugs &cishetmen

it's funny cuz I'm definitely in a major depressive self-destructive spiral but I'm also doing things like "getting outside of exclusively trans spaces" and "hanging out with men" which are all objectively good things for me to do given how one-dimensional my life has been

last week was a trio of extremely rough Rejection Of Affections Returned and it has me wanting to just burn everything to the ground and move far away and start over from zero

I think my girlfriend forgetting the anniversary plans we had made to prioritize biting the shit out of another girl ten feet away from me//within clear earshot of me, and then putting in zero effort to reschedule our anniversary plans, has like, fundamentally broken something in the core of my soul