i got a shirt that says "Warning: Objects in mirror may be more Sarcastic than they appear" so i can ball it up & nut in it about 4000 times

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller
December 21,1945

Pete Campbell is up there with Captain Ahab and Willy Loman as one of the all-time great characters in American fiction

some shit that would happen to me. sluggo i feel your pain my friend

🚨🚨🚨 MAJOR ALERT: EVERYONE BREAK YOUR PHONE RIGHT NOW !!!

cuz I’m a sheep
I’m a shear-do
What the hell am I doing here?
I don’t baa-long here

rewatched The Holdovers…perfect christmas movie methinks

asked my friend at the bar last night to tell me about his breakup and spent the following 15 minutes imagining cool basketball moves in my head while he talked

love the line in Death of a Salesman when he goes “you don’t eat the orange and throw away the peel!” yes you do lol