i have dark hair and the palest skin and it's right in front where my part is. im finished

i really wish i could just hibernate until my shit is better. i feel like shriveling up and being put in the ground so i can rise anew in a few months chock full of new leaves. but maybe just getting more sleep and waking up before noon could work

it's the weirdest thing ever, im so good and fine (just tired) during the day and when im around people. as soon as im alone my brain just goes haywire. rinse and repeat. ive had some okay nights but only okay. and everyone is also going thru their own shit so i got no outlet

no hate to John they just have very different vibes

i hate that the only site i actually like to use is the worst for advertising myself but i think that's exactly why every other site makes me sad cuz that's what everyone else is doing

there's a small chance she's seen my new name on fb or ig but she's not on either very much, plus i'd think she'd have said my new name in that case. however i CAN also see her being like "wait. shit. did i see she changed her name? oh fuck i think she's a they now too. ah fuck i fucked up--"