But wait, if *I'M* on the spectrum, and *YOU'RE* on the spectrum, then WHO'S FLYING THE PLANE?

Boyfriend's mom said she loves me for the first time today and she's always treated me like family since the moment we met and been so nice to me and eeuuugwwehh

who up grinding they stump

PSA for all my antidepressant-consuming baddies: grapefruit Jarritos have no real grapefruit juice in them so you can enjoy a delightful and refreshing grapefruit flavored soda without the threat of death :)

Boyfriend wanted to go to walmart last night with a vague statement of just, "candy". He walked us swiftly to the easter section and picked up not 1, not 2, not 3, but 4 (four) of these 3 pound bags of Robin's Eggs. That is 12 pounds of Robin's Eggs. I am so in love with this guy

I thought my favorite isopod passed like 8 months ago because I hadn't seen her since then, but look who rolled up to the feeding station today... none other than Big Bertha herself :) I can tell her apart because she has a distinctive black mark on her right antenna that has stayed through molting

boyfriend called me "his little goldfish" this morning bc I do this a lot

this came to me in a dream

i WILL be the main character on this train

how much cunt is it appropriate to serve at a pirate-themed party

You're in a room with 2 doors and 2 guards. 1 always lies and the other always tells the truth. 1 drips drool onto my face while I'm sleeping and the other bashes his face into my nose and mouth until I wake up. they both know each other. You can ask one question to gain freedom. What do you ask?

Most bugs frighten me but isopods man... how could I, a human with a heart and soul, look at a little land crustacean that is lovingly referred to as a "roly-poly" and not shed a tear for this cherished insect