man with helmet looks like penis
@hasmustache.bsky.social
whenever a man comes out of the bathroom I think “he just touched his Penis”
April 21, 2025 at 9:25 PM
whenever a man comes out of the bathroom I think “he just touched his Penis”
the new Pope will have a great big dick
April 21, 2025 at 9:13 PM
the new Pope will have a great big dick
are you allowed to jerk off on the sabbath? for religious purposes is that considered “work” ?
March 15, 2025 at 6:13 PM
are you allowed to jerk off on the sabbath? for religious purposes is that considered “work” ?
headed to Costco with the fellas to get a big ass box of otter pops
March 10, 2025 at 10:41 PM
headed to Costco with the fellas to get a big ass box of otter pops
unable to do my banking on X rn :(
March 10, 2025 at 10:08 PM
unable to do my banking on X rn :(
in the strip club trying to look cool by avoiding eye contact and eating a box of raisins
February 27, 2025 at 8:58 PM
in the strip club trying to look cool by avoiding eye contact and eating a box of raisins
“you are the first guy i’ve ever been able to deepthroat” is not a compliment ladies please stop saying it to me
February 16, 2025 at 9:13 PM
“you are the first guy i’ve ever been able to deepthroat” is not a compliment ladies please stop saying it to me
to explain the US government you should know that these old dudes running it grew up in a time watching The Honeymooners where the only joke was that the husband was this close to beating the shit out of his wife, and that was like the number one show at the time people loved it
February 12, 2025 at 5:04 PM
to explain the US government you should know that these old dudes running it grew up in a time watching The Honeymooners where the only joke was that the husband was this close to beating the shit out of his wife, and that was like the number one show at the time people loved it
made a man on here. sorry! lol I know it’s difficult, but anyway he’s going to do everything I tell him, and be mathematical
February 9, 2025 at 7:20 AM
made a man on here. sorry! lol I know it’s difficult, but anyway he’s going to do everything I tell him, and be mathematical
me: i like this thing
rando: i don’t care for that thing
me [lips to microphone] KEEP SCROLLING BITCH
rando: i don’t care for that thing
me [lips to microphone] KEEP SCROLLING BITCH
February 8, 2025 at 9:47 PM
me: i like this thing
rando: i don’t care for that thing
me [lips to microphone] KEEP SCROLLING BITCH
rando: i don’t care for that thing
me [lips to microphone] KEEP SCROLLING BITCH
X (derogatory)
February 3, 2025 at 2:11 AM
X (derogatory)
hosting a super bowl party with only a free Tubi subscription, the same Lunesta commercial comes on for the eighth time, the fellas start booing
February 1, 2025 at 10:44 PM
hosting a super bowl party with only a free Tubi subscription, the same Lunesta commercial comes on for the eighth time, the fellas start booing
Rollin with the homies wearin chapstick
February 1, 2025 at 6:26 PM
Rollin with the homies wearin chapstick
Reposted by man with helmet looks like penis
[at her place] something to help us relax? yeah I got something to help us relax [shows her my asthma inhaler]
January 30, 2025 at 10:44 PM
[at her place] something to help us relax? yeah I got something to help us relax [shows her my asthma inhaler]
[at her place] something to help us relax? yeah I got something to help us relax [shows her my asthma inhaler]
January 30, 2025 at 10:44 PM
[at her place] something to help us relax? yeah I got something to help us relax [shows her my asthma inhaler]
Reposted by man with helmet looks like penis
Gordon Ramsay: So Cormac, what are we making?
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
January 27, 2025 at 3:52 AM
Gordon Ramsay: So Cormac, what are we making?
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
wow the Trump administration sure did pull a heck of a boner!!
January 28, 2025 at 8:57 PM
wow the Trump administration sure did pull a heck of a boner!!
knew it was coming but I lost my job as DEI coordinator at the hymnal company, it was my job to put in all the homoerotic references in the church songs
January 28, 2025 at 7:35 PM
knew it was coming but I lost my job as DEI coordinator at the hymnal company, it was my job to put in all the homoerotic references in the church songs
you’re in her DMs, I’m in her presence as we walk together sharing intimate revelations of the soul feeling whole and complete in each other’s auras blissfully enjoined and mostly talking shit about your whack DMs she gets
January 28, 2025 at 4:39 AM
you’re in her DMs, I’m in her presence as we walk together sharing intimate revelations of the soul feeling whole and complete in each other’s auras blissfully enjoined and mostly talking shit about your whack DMs she gets
sorry, B Real, but I actually can understand that
January 28, 2025 at 2:20 AM
sorry, B Real, but I actually can understand that
banging your mom (respectful)
January 27, 2025 at 10:56 PM
banging your mom (respectful)
Gordon Ramsay: So Cormac, what are we making?
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
January 27, 2025 at 3:52 AM
Gordon Ramsay: So Cormac, what are we making?
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
Cormac McCarthy: Nothing compels man’s palate than war. Violence preexisted man, but man nurtured it, cultivated it like a dark vineyard. Drank it like a wine and buried the pomace for rebirth.
Joe Bastianich: Smart.
Gordon: Don’t forget the seasoning.
it would be kinda funny if patrick mahomes dick fell off while he was fucking his nazi wife
January 27, 2025 at 3:15 AM
it would be kinda funny if patrick mahomes dick fell off while he was fucking his nazi wife
eddie money: i’ve got two tickets to paradise won’t you pack your bags we leave tonight
me: I shall pack nothing, edward. my paradise supplies its own heavenly treasures
me: I shall pack nothing, edward. my paradise supplies its own heavenly treasures
January 26, 2025 at 2:01 PM
eddie money: i’ve got two tickets to paradise won’t you pack your bags we leave tonight
me: I shall pack nothing, edward. my paradise supplies its own heavenly treasures
me: I shall pack nothing, edward. my paradise supplies its own heavenly treasures
having some of paul newman’s creamy caesar
January 26, 2025 at 8:33 AM
having some of paul newman’s creamy caesar