@gumplr.bsky.social
For an extra grand, I'll let you take me out to dinner.
"Your honor... if my client had really wanted to massacre that elementary school, how come he didn't kill all of the children, not just some? Why didn't he wait until recess and target the playground? To wit...!" Meanwhile, the front page features video of a child wailing and begging for food.
July 24, 2025 at 6:20 PM
"Your honor... if my client had really wanted to massacre that elementary school, how come he didn't kill all of the children, not just some? Why didn't he wait until recess and target the playground? To wit...!" Meanwhile, the front page features video of a child wailing and begging for food.
the absolute worst platform for this particular observation
April 19, 2025 at 1:30 AM
the absolute worst platform for this particular observation
Is this motherfucker listening to IN RAINBOWS!?
December 13, 2024 at 12:18 AM
Is this motherfucker listening to IN RAINBOWS!?
they’re going to kill me
October 26, 2024 at 11:42 PM
they’re going to kill me
first batch of GOTV postcards for the weekend #didthistoday
October 26, 2024 at 4:26 PM
first batch of GOTV postcards for the weekend #didthistoday
Texted my wife that I was bring home some bees. Thanks for nothing, buddy!
June 12, 2024 at 9:18 PM
Texted my wife that I was bring home some bees. Thanks for nothing, buddy!
bernie commiserates
November 24, 2023 at 5:15 AM
bernie commiserates