Mr. Miyagi... everyone wants to punch me in the head. But I really want to go to the Grammy's.
"I have idea!"
"I have idea!"
February 3, 2025 at 4:18 PM
Mr. Miyagi... everyone wants to punch me in the head. But I really want to go to the Grammy's.
"I have idea!"
"I have idea!"
American Airlines and the US Army hadn't even had time to exchange insurance information and Trump was already admitting fault.
February 2, 2025 at 8:34 PM
American Airlines and the US Army hadn't even had time to exchange insurance information and Trump was already admitting fault.
Four more years of winter.
February 2, 2025 at 8:27 PM
Four more years of winter.
Me: [gets up off of couch]
Smart Watch: "Great job staying active!"
Me: [immediately crawls into bed]
Smart Watch: "Great job staying active!"
Me: [immediately crawls into bed]
January 17, 2025 at 5:33 PM
Me: [gets up off of couch]
Smart Watch: "Great job staying active!"
Me: [immediately crawls into bed]
Smart Watch: "Great job staying active!"
Me: [immediately crawls into bed]
I'd like an open face butter sandwich.
"You mean toast with butter?"
Whatever.
"You mean toast with butter?"
Whatever.
December 22, 2024 at 9:04 PM
I'd like an open face butter sandwich.
"You mean toast with butter?"
Whatever.
"You mean toast with butter?"
Whatever.
When/where is the next Live Nation annual investor conference?
December 10, 2024 at 4:15 PM
When/where is the next Live Nation annual investor conference?
Luigi Mangione. When your real name sounds more fake than your fake name.
December 9, 2024 at 6:56 PM
Luigi Mangione. When your real name sounds more fake than your fake name.
The NRA would like to remind you to store your guns, ammunition, and manifestos in separate, locked containers.
December 9, 2024 at 6:56 PM
The NRA would like to remind you to store your guns, ammunition, and manifestos in separate, locked containers.
If you don't smoke a cigarette while you make it, can you still call it green bean casserole?
November 28, 2024 at 6:00 PM
If you don't smoke a cigarette while you make it, can you still call it green bean casserole?
You call yourself a box? You're nothing. I've seen wet Kleenex with more tensile strength than you.
November 24, 2024 at 6:25 AM
You call yourself a box? You're nothing. I've seen wet Kleenex with more tensile strength than you.
Gone too and too soon. #RIP #chuckwoolery
November 24, 2024 at 6:23 AM
Gone too and too soon. #RIP #chuckwoolery
It's like I'm driving behind a freshly caught lumber monster.
November 20, 2024 at 10:52 PM
It's like I'm driving behind a freshly caught lumber monster.
I'm here. How do we play Farmville on this?
November 19, 2024 at 3:29 PM
I'm here. How do we play Farmville on this?