how to force yourself to draw GF aaaaaaaaaaaa I can't force myself anymore help help help

I just hope I don't kms

actually I really had thoughts of simply disappearing from the Internet so as not to spoil people's mood, etc. I feel like I do not deserve to post something on the Internet after all this. hah nahh what idk

I didn't want my art to make someone feel uncomfortable, I've been bringing positivity and goodness to everyone all my life. when a person blocks me, first of all, I blame myself and only myself. a person like me cannot be on the Internet. i'm disgusting. hah idk just wanted shared my thoughts.

I have so many ideas for comics, but I understand that my strength and my time are simply not enough. my gosh aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

now, I can only draw stupid GF doodles, I spend more of my energy on drawing OCs. and also, my drawings turn out much worse when I draw it not with pleasure. actually makes sense hah.

it's bad when I don't enjoy drawing something, but people are waiting, so I draw. right now it's really difficult to draw something on GF, because my friend and I came up with new OCs and now all thoughts are only about them.

I just did not expect that I would have an audience? I was just always in the shadow of everything, I was never someone on the Internet. and with this influx of people I was confused. and brought myself to a very bad condition.