me: but in hetero-normative relationships -
le boyf: WOAH, someone’s had their alphabetti spaghetti today :D

le boyf: *MASSIVE TOOT
me: woah, buddy, you got a license for that?
le boyf, with a newly accredited pilots license: well yes, I have a license for taking flight :3

✨the cat scratches the carpet✨
boyf, disapproving look: “I’m disappointed in you Yenna.
yenna: *slow blinks
boyf: no amount of batting your eyelashes is gonna get you out of this, mine are simply more fabulous

(it’s true, they are beautiful. i am jealous)

✨men✨
me: im so sick of insta only showing me weight loss and “how to attract a man” content. my life does not revolve around men. hell, nothing in life should revolve around ONLY men!
boyf, listening to my rant: hmmm hula hoops do

boyf: hey my eyes are up here
me: sorry, i can’t help it when it looks like you were sculpted by Michelangelo
boyf: the turtle

✨teaching le boyf how to play assassins creed valhalla✨

me: if you grab more berries, you store them as rations to heal during battle
boyf: that feels unfair to my enemies
me: 😐
boyf: 😐

✨can you carry my heavy books✨
me: please? 🥺
boyf: no im carrying everything else
me: pretty please? 🥺🥺
boyf: with a cherry on top?
me: yeh 🥺👉👈
boyf: no, i don’t like cherries

✨ladders✨
me: i don’t want to keep the ladder in the kitchen it’s so ugly
boyf: but it’s a ✨feat of engineering✨
me: only you could describe ladders that way
boyf: IT’S PORTABLE STAIRS! IT IS A FEAT IT’S SO COOL!

boyf, feeding me mangos: i love this it’s like i’m at a zoo
me: now it’s less fun
*gets another mango slice
boyf, giggling: hehe i can pet this monkey
*gives me headpats

me: stop being so melodramatic
boyf: there is nothing mellow about me, i am just ✨dramatic✨

✨the new cat✨

how i told my parents about it: oh yeh we have a cat her name is Yenna

how boyf told his parents about it: a cat box arrived in the mail which was wierd and gorlf made us go on a walk to this wierd building where everyone knew her and they gave us a cat for some reason

✨the shopping trip✨

boyf: oh my god look i didn’t know they wrote a book about you!

me, scared of the dark: wait don’t turn the light off until i go upstairs
boyf: *turns the light off, “oooh spooky dark”
me: you treat me like a child
boyf, turning the upstairs light on: no i treat you like a moth. OOOH look gorlf, a ✨lamp✨

*boyf making brekky
*points at toast
boyf: you’re toast!

*Boyf trying to decide what bread to get for the new toaster
Me: we’re getting thick white bread because you are what you eat

me and boyf on the escalator
me: legolas, what do your elf eyes see?
him, *looking directly at me cause I’m short: a hobbit :3

reviving my old account that was simply just boyf updates/quotes cause he got sad i deleted the bird app last year xx