G. A. Nuttall
ganuttall.bsky.social
G. A. Nuttall
@ganuttall.bsky.social
I was born in Prince George, British Columbia, Canada, and raised on a small island by my mom, two dogs, five cats, and a hamster.

I write for Vancouver Gazette.

If you enjoy my work, you can support it by subscribing at https://ganuttall.substack.com/
“They’re sailors and cowboys! What more could some lucky lady want?!”
Kristofferson Family 2025 Newsletter
The Year in Review
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December 29, 2025 at 6:23 AM
Christmas is coming
Day Twelve of Advent
Day Before the Feast of St. Lucia
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December 13, 2025 at 1:23 AM
“Uncle Ernie killed Korvettenkapitän Robert Bartels on August 20, 1943.”
Nazi Hunting Men
All the old men hunted Nazis when I grew up.
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December 3, 2025 at 11:37 PM
“Do you have a go-bag prepared for personal survival in the case of societal collapse?”
Your Astrological Report for November 2025
Sponsored Content
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November 27, 2025 at 2:52 AM
Nobody is perfect
Lunch with Teddy
I had lunch with my artist friend Theodoros (Teddy) recently.
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November 16, 2025 at 5:25 PM
When we were young, we would just walk up to someone and ask them to play. No hesitation. What changed?
Dear Jane from Toronto (Lonely)
Advice Column Sort of No. 03
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November 9, 2025 at 5:47 PM
“While I’m not sure your manager is a bully per se, they do seem, on balance, prima facie, like a complete a–hole…”
Dear Pat From Vancouver No. 02 (Office Bully)
Advice Column Sort of
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November 2, 2025 at 7:00 AM
Congratulations on your breakup!
Dear Jane From Vancouver No. 01
Advice Column Sort of
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October 27, 2025 at 8:37 PM
Recently discovered letter from Vancouver business patriarch Darius Catchpole.
A Redacted Family Feud: Letter from Darius Catchpole, 1965
Old Stuff No. 3
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October 19, 2025 at 12:05 AM
Short attention span poetry…
Poetry: Straw Man
Old Stuff No. 2
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October 11, 2025 at 11:43 PM
Memoirs of a Disenchanted Job Hunter
Old Stuff No. 1: Memoirs of a Disenchanted Young Blaine, Job Hunter
Alfie’s misanthropic cousin Blaine goes job hunting
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October 4, 2025 at 8:12 PM
The poorest neighbourhoods appear to have the most authentic culture. I often walk through Canada’s poorest neighbourhood, Strathcona…
Outside the Palace of Me
Authenticity Lives in the Poorest Neighbourhoods
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September 27, 2025 at 7:22 AM
“Myself, I want to go by shark attack, Percy said. Preferably in my sleep. Quick, painless, and I’m completely unaware…
Alfie Plays Blackjack
A visit to the Bootlegger’s house.
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September 20, 2025 at 4:04 PM
“Words without deep personal commitment behind them have the shelf life of lettuce. To pull out of this death spiral we must, each of us, change the way we live…”
Kalle Lasn on the Spirit of Occupy
Just as Adbusters' worldwide circulation climbed beyond 100,000 and our NGO was becoming a geopolitical force to be reckoned with, a strange thing happened.
open.substack.com
September 17, 2025 at 1:24 PM
“Often dismissed as just another harvest mouse, Saputo Incorporated CEO Henry Miller is eager to make his mark on Canada’s beloved cheese giant…”
Aggressive Young CEO Leads the Charge
Beneath Henry M. Miller’s laid-back facade lies an aggressive fighter
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September 13, 2025 at 7:49 AM
“What strikes me about this image is just how relaxed and unperturbed everyone appears. This scene is so common to people that we take no note of it.”
Jonathan Gordon Smith Died Here
Behind Every Statistic Is Someone Special
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September 7, 2025 at 3:32 PM
“¹ You say you care.

² If you care, you will respond in a way that visibly shows acknowledgment.

³ You care when you deem something important and worthy of concern…”
Samael’s Epistle to the Karens
A doctrinal epistolary poem in nine verses
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August 30, 2025 at 8:49 AM
Give them time, and we may eventually see an American left making hand-crafted artisanal revolvers alongside their beeswax candles, moustache wax, and beard oil.
Hot Chamber Magazine: A New Voice in Gun Culture
Fun, Fearless, and Fully Loaded
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August 23, 2025 at 6:01 PM
Internal government documents reveal plan to deploy AI-equipped robots to reduce human law-enforcement headcount and to use them as a bargaining chip in upcoming salary negotiations…
Email Misfire Reveals Government Contractor’s Push for Automated Police Forces
Leaked email outlines cost-cutting measures, staff reductions, and strategy ahead of collective agreement talks
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August 13, 2025 at 7:58 PM
Don’t just eulogize your younger self who wasted your potential. Make yourself smell better.
QUIET SURRENDER is a fragrance that lingers
Brought to you by Bulbourethrex™, makers of Zagbonix™
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August 11, 2025 at 8:58 AM
Orange Cat peed on Uncle Eddie’s marijuana seeds and now they won’t germinate. I should have been watching him better…
Confessions of a Lapsed Child
An Itemized Statement of Accounts
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August 9, 2025 at 3:04 PM
So what would happen if the American president sent troops across the Canadian border?
My Son Asked About World War III
It Made Me Think About Canada’s Defence
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August 3, 2025 at 6:30 PM
That's got to be fantastic for about three minutes, Wim agreed. But what the hell do you talk about next? Watch unboxing videos and talk about my anxiety? Hayley Kiyoko? Is she still a thing?
Coffee with Wim: On Aging, Attraction, and Not Being Twenty
Meta-Modern Sounds in Post‑Toxic Masculinity
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July 30, 2025 at 7:49 AM
This classic book about pet adoption and the occult helped transform public attitudes toward domesticated pet ownership…
Smoothy Remembers Sparks Bidding War
This book actually kicked off the Satanic Panic of the early 1980s
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July 21, 2025 at 8:29 PM
At the Frankfurt Book Fair last year, Kristina Hannelore Luger-Braun at Pangolin House Double Kampf™ made me an offer I almost could not refuse…
Reflections of a Modestly Remunerated Substack Writer, No. 1
This message brought to you by Zagbonix™
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July 18, 2025 at 11:46 PM