Then im getting out of here i need to leave this area my family and start anew. I need to for my medical and phycological well being. Also for those who have been here and have helped. You have helped me so much and i love you all.

I dont know how much more i can take. But im going to try. I am going to work on myself and try to get out of this depression. Im going to put the energy toward cleaning myself up putting the energy in to try to do better and work for a job. Then im saving again once im caught up

way to misgender and dead name me and it hurts. They also go out of there way to try to force and push a political party and candidate that is actively against me, my choices, and my health. The amount ive been yelled at for this really hurts me. I am at the end of rope.

Finally there my close family issues. I have always been told that my family is very supportive and will accept me. But as of recently i feel that is the farthest from the truth. They may say they do but there action show more than there word. First of all they go out of there

It was about money and how big of a controlling awful bitch that my aunt is. This is honestly fucking my whole family over. My mom had left her job to take care of my grandma and now has no job and a real hard time getting one and there fucking fighting is really hurting us.

That scares me even more. then there the family aspect of all this. That been even rougher. First of all i lost my grandma during all this crap. Honestly it a shit shoe too. My grandma kids my aunts and uncles are fighting so much it not even over that she dead.

With the way the job search is going and my finances are going now i cant pay for that. Also the way the laws are going here who knows if finding a new doctor will be a fix for long. I'm scared they are taking all my paths away. i know there is the diy method but honestly

Now on top of this i need to get out of here the way my doctors and insurance have done a complete 180 on me and my hrt it fucking sucks. i cant get it at all right now. i have to find a new doctors and deal with paying it all out of pocket to get my medications.

Jobs and just not even interviewing or hiring me. I have cert and degrees In Information technology and those are not helping me. I cant even get a job at Fast food for one of the rare interviews i got. It honestly fucking sucks.

Where they kept me for depressive episode with suicidal ideations. I ended up leaving that job because of it. Then after that i went on a job hunt for something i still wanted to get out of here. That honestly has not gone well i cannot find a job. Not from a lack of trying.

I really needed and wanted that job. i wanted the money that job provided so i could finally leave my family home and strike out on my own. That did not work out though. i pushed myself too much and my emotions broke me. I ended up in the hospital.

But this time it was different i am and at the time was on hrt and it honestly fucked with how i delt with people and my emotions. I emotionally could not handle the emotions that came with helping others on the phone but i was stupid and keep trying to push through.