It may not show in my face, but I'm anxious AF. I don't know how I'll make it to fall asleep lol

#Habitica

Easy pick.

bsky.app/profile/honn...

I just. Need someone to understand. There are so many things in my head, none of which have taken form. Not yet. Maybe not ever. It stresses me to no end, and yet I'm so used to it. Maybe that's why I'm a walking ball of anxiety. There's so much in my head.

Fuck, I need a new psychologist.

I hate nighttime because its silence leaves me alone with my thoughts, and they're never good. I hate not being able to ask for help because they won't understand. Because they'll think I'm exaggerating, that it's not that big of a deal. I hate the prospect of being called a hypochondriac.

I hate feeling alone. I hate being alone. I hate going through shit and no one around me understanding what's wrong with me. I hate having my interest in something I love doubted. I hate being called lazy. I hate them being right. I hate knowing they're in the wrong, but can I truly fight them back?

And I hate knowing what may be causing this, because I can't afford to take care of that right now. Because, no matter how many times I may apply to whatever job, they never call. I hate crying at 2 am and it not being a "crying myself to sleep" situation. I hate insomnia.

WAIT I THOUGHT IT WAS A REBLOG WAIT WAIT HOLY SHIT THAT'S DOPE AF HUH?????