We should all dress like "Florida Man" on the airplane.

This headline should say "Congress passes bill to force POTUS to stop hiding evidence" @cnn.com

Pregnant women: DON'T take parenting advice from the dude who's ex-wife "accidentally" fell down the stairs.

Sums it up.

There's a Mitch Hedberg joke for EVERYTHING.

#Skeksis

Hopefully other Colleges and Universities are paying attention. The only way to overcome a bully is to fight back. #Harvard

I'm going to memorize a random line from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas, then quote it to every Jesus freak who tries to tell me what it says in the Bible. Hunter S. Thompson is just as relevant to the world today as any ancient dude writing on parchment.

Stop burying the lede. This headline should read... SENILE POTUS PLANS TO ASK CORRUPT SCOTUS TO LET HIM DO MORE ILLEGAL THINGS

You mean more "major" than the national crisis we're already in?

1256 days.

Welcome to my new account dedicated to poking fun at men who claim to be "alpha males" while cowering like frightened puppies at the mere mention of walking alone at night in a big city. Who's with me? Tag me on any examples and I will re-post! #GOPAfraidOfCities