Essex County Mauve
@essexcountymauve.bsky.social
Lurker, skulker, observer, maybe poster? Sworn enemy of that one city in Delaware. You know the one.
Among dogs, an unlikely Prince record is the default favorite.
January 10, 2026 at 9:55 PM
Among dogs, an unlikely Prince record is the default favorite.
I cannot get over the subway Weight Watchers ad. Everyone featured looks like they're in a hostage video. Someone turned on a high-powered fan and said "DANCE DANCE DANCE" and they are kind of doing it (except for Sad Guy at the start) but they don't know why, and they would prefer not to.
January 1, 2026 at 5:37 PM
I cannot get over the subway Weight Watchers ad. Everyone featured looks like they're in a hostage video. Someone turned on a high-powered fan and said "DANCE DANCE DANCE" and they are kind of doing it (except for Sad Guy at the start) but they don't know why, and they would prefer not to.
Did u know that Rye is both an Erotic City and an Erotic Town?
December 13, 2025 at 7:25 PM
Did u know that Rye is both an Erotic City and an Erotic Town?
The best word that isn't categorically obscene, but sounds like it should be, is "Kundalini."
December 10, 2025 at 10:16 PM
The best word that isn't categorically obscene, but sounds like it should be, is "Kundalini."
Sean Duffy to BAN rear-door boarding, because it sounds kind of gay.
November 20, 2025 at 3:55 PM
Sean Duffy to BAN rear-door boarding, because it sounds kind of gay.
Which is the better Beach Boys celebration of bisexuality: "Be True To Your School" or "Bob or Ann?"
November 18, 2025 at 11:44 AM
Which is the better Beach Boys celebration of bisexuality: "Be True To Your School" or "Bob or Ann?"
Every person named Aidan should have a little brother named Abettan.
November 16, 2025 at 7:47 PM
Every person named Aidan should have a little brother named Abettan.
Your mom's so fat, referendums on her are statewide.
October 30, 2025 at 7:16 PM
Your mom's so fat, referendums on her are statewide.
I didn't realize the refusal to release the series on Blu-ray was a criminal offense.
October 28, 2025 at 5:12 PM
I didn't realize the refusal to release the series on Blu-ray was a criminal offense.
Tariffs are just congestion pricing for anime figurines, camera lenses, and model train sets.
October 18, 2025 at 1:43 PM
Tariffs are just congestion pricing for anime figurines, camera lenses, and model train sets.
Real talk:
Last Judge yells "diarrhea" before the fight, right?
Last Judge yells "diarrhea" before the fight, right?
October 13, 2025 at 10:32 PM
Real talk:
Last Judge yells "diarrhea" before the fight, right?
Last Judge yells "diarrhea" before the fight, right?
If there's ever a Lord of the Rings parody consisting entirely of Todd Rundgren jams, "To Fangorn" better be one of them.
July 5, 2025 at 1:49 PM
If there's ever a Lord of the Rings parody consisting entirely of Todd Rundgren jams, "To Fangorn" better be one of them.
Every 6-3 ruling is a relief in the narrow sense that Ginsburg's selfish decision to play Russian roulette with her legacy did not matter.
June 27, 2025 at 3:22 PM
Every 6-3 ruling is a relief in the narrow sense that Ginsburg's selfish decision to play Russian roulette with her legacy did not matter.
This moment feels very late-Bush II: lots of smug, disingenuous assholes on the teevee talking about how they're going to crush all dissent through the power of their will. Brings me back! I feel young again.
June 8, 2025 at 3:53 PM
This moment feels very late-Bush II: lots of smug, disingenuous assholes on the teevee talking about how they're going to crush all dissent through the power of their will. Brings me back! I feel young again.
Although I liked the Gatwa era: while Doctor Who is a show about a time-traveling alien called the Doctor, it is at its best when it is not *about* the time-traveling alien called the Doctor.
Davies understood this in 2005, attracting many new fans by staying far away from Gallifrey. What changed?
Davies understood this in 2005, attracting many new fans by staying far away from Gallifrey. What changed?
June 3, 2025 at 12:24 AM
Although I liked the Gatwa era: while Doctor Who is a show about a time-traveling alien called the Doctor, it is at its best when it is not *about* the time-traveling alien called the Doctor.
Davies understood this in 2005, attracting many new fans by staying far away from Gallifrey. What changed?
Davies understood this in 2005, attracting many new fans by staying far away from Gallifrey. What changed?
This year, on DOCTOR WHO, a CLASSIC villain from the 70s/80s suddenly returns, so that Radio Times can explain . . . who the fuck this person is, and why we care (we don't). It's the greatest challenge the Doctor has ever faced, since the last time. It will last TWO EPISODES.
May 25, 2025 at 2:51 PM
This year, on DOCTOR WHO, a CLASSIC villain from the 70s/80s suddenly returns, so that Radio Times can explain . . . who the fuck this person is, and why we care (we don't). It's the greatest challenge the Doctor has ever faced, since the last time. It will last TWO EPISODES.
*sighs, tears up his "River Song Bigenerates into Julianna Margulies" Doctor Who fanfic*
May 18, 2025 at 1:46 PM
*sighs, tears up his "River Song Bigenerates into Julianna Margulies" Doctor Who fanfic*
Having a great time pretending everyone in the tri-state area is sad because of Stevie Nicks.
May 16, 2025 at 11:51 AM
Having a great time pretending everyone in the tri-state area is sad because of Stevie Nicks.
I want to deport you
All of you, giiiirrrrrrl
But not my sister-in-law
I think her name's Debroshka?
All of you, giiiirrrrrrl
But not my sister-in-law
I think her name's Debroshka?
March 31, 2025 at 11:46 AM
I want to deport you
All of you, giiiirrrrrrl
But not my sister-in-law
I think her name's Debroshka?
All of you, giiiirrrrrrl
But not my sister-in-law
I think her name's Debroshka?
@vinnythomas.bsky.social never misses.
DOGE audits the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration
TikTok video by Vinny
www.tiktok.com
March 16, 2025 at 5:55 PM
@vinnythomas.bsky.social never misses.
Excited that the Xenoblade Chronicles X remaster reintroduces the iconic T-Fal as a playable character, whose non-stick coating makes navigating Mira a breeze. Heated up, she's super effective against bird-type indigens in enclosed spaces. And don't miss out on battle skills like "Anodizing Ray!"
February 23, 2025 at 1:53 AM
Excited that the Xenoblade Chronicles X remaster reintroduces the iconic T-Fal as a playable character, whose non-stick coating makes navigating Mira a breeze. Heated up, she's super effective against bird-type indigens in enclosed spaces. And don't miss out on battle skills like "Anodizing Ray!"
Saved you the room you used to stay in every Sunday
(It exists in a state of dimensional flux
And its location depends on arcane formulas)
The one that is warmed by sunshine only occasionally.
(It exists in a state of dimensional flux
And its location depends on arcane formulas)
The one that is warmed by sunshine only occasionally.
February 17, 2025 at 12:48 PM
Saved you the room you used to stay in every Sunday
(It exists in a state of dimensional flux
And its location depends on arcane formulas)
The one that is warmed by sunshine only occasionally.
(It exists in a state of dimensional flux
And its location depends on arcane formulas)
The one that is warmed by sunshine only occasionally.
"Hiro Takes a Fall (Semester Seminar Class Pass-Fail)."
January 26, 2025 at 6:14 PM
"Hiro Takes a Fall (Semester Seminar Class Pass-Fail)."
ACKTUALLY, leopards don't eat faces. They far prefer digits. #nobigcatslander
December 30, 2024 at 4:04 PM
ACKTUALLY, leopards don't eat faces. They far prefer digits. #nobigcatslander
The scariest part of Nosferatu?
Orlok doesn't even insist on an inspection before closing on that fixer-upper of a castle.
Orlok doesn't even insist on an inspection before closing on that fixer-upper of a castle.
December 30, 2024 at 3:22 AM
The scariest part of Nosferatu?
Orlok doesn't even insist on an inspection before closing on that fixer-upper of a castle.
Orlok doesn't even insist on an inspection before closing on that fixer-upper of a castle.