I fucking hate it when I potion on my desk spills and ruins the tome im looking at. Dude the keeper of stories is gonna killlll me

This just in: evil fae queen revealed to be an even more evil, even worse fae queen

Blood coming out of me! My blood! It’s mine!

I love coming to my parents house to gab because it’s just them interrupting me and then me interrupting them and then my mom and me interrupting my dad and everyone getting pissed off and then the cycle begins again. And no one tells their whole story. Where else can I act like this

Just found out I think my itchy scalp is an allergic reaction. And if I find out I have become allergic to head and shoulders, shampoo MADE for sensitive dry itchy scalps, I’m gonna break my phone and start over in a new continent

Overheard at the magic store: I’m not calling you a bitch, I’m saying your actions are bitchy

someone I know talking about how unfriendly the locals were in Hawaii when they went on vacation like hm. I wonder why they might feel that way toward you. hm that’s so weird

having a sales quota at work is like calling people during the last half of the month and going “PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!”

this is what i feel like trying to make sense of and explain my devils-minion-happened-in-show-canon-and-armand-is-alice-but-not-really-and-reverse-devils-minion-is-going-to-happen theory lmao

me and my vampire lestat shirt against the world #vampcrew #iwtv #iwtvamc

My beautiful boys 💜🧡

#IWTV #DEVILSMINION

Microdosing short form content after deleting TikTok by just watching SNL skits on YouTube