I've also been having a lot of problems with the Ducclings' father. Even though we've been separated for two years he's still been bullying me and I have had to have the police and social services involved.

It's been a really, really rough couple of months and am sorry. I really am. (3/3)

Am also working on righting wrongs I unfortunately did while having a complete and utter mental breakdown. I wasn't myself at all.

I'll be reaching out and offering explanations and apologies to those I know I've pissed off, and it'll be up to them whether they accept or not. (2/3)

I don't expect anyone to fully understand, or even try to imagine the absolute hell that's been ravaging my brain & life for about half a year now.

I need to be well again. I need to be mentally sound. I need to be healthy & stop myself from further destruction.

I'm sorry. For everything. (6/6)

I don't have any self sympathy, & I don't need your sympathy, either; I don't deserve an ounce of it.

So, I will be stepping away from this account. I may be back when I am back on my medication, & I am well again. In a few hours, I will be deactivating. Maybe perma. Idk yet. (5/?)

I need to solely focus on getting well again, & focus on my children.

I deserve what has happened to me. The best I can do is try & fix my mental health before I even think about trying to reach out & attempt to potentially repair bridges. (4/?)

I do not trust myself until I am medicated once more & in regular therapy. I've hurt people along the way & am 100% responsible for this. If I could apologise to them, I would, but I don't think they'd listen or accept. Plus, honestly; am a fucking coward & too anxious & afraid to face them. (3/?)

My mental state is the worst it's been in years. I've been like this for months at this point. It's led me to make some choices I wouldn't make while sane & I've made irreversible mistakes that I can't ever see myself fixing. (2/?)

*picking UP. Damn. Eepy

If anyone would like to help towards life expenses or gift me a pick-me-up, then yeah, it's really frickin' appreciated. Thank you. 💛

Hoping to upload the new ko-fi art after a bit more sleeeeeeep. (4/4)

throne.com/ducc
ko-fi.com/ducc

but I do have a screenshot of calls I made around that time to my mum. I have videos of my ex husband walking around my property & gesticulating.

I have been left terrified.

I know all of this happening at once seems ridiculous; but it IS and it's TRUE. I can prove any and all of this. (3/4)

I was incredibly scared, I was sobbing and shaking, but I was just left to it.

What did I do "wrong"?

Told him to "get out of my house" after he started getting mocking and intimidating towards me.

My 999 call hasn't been saved to my log, android doesn't save them for security reasons, (2/4)

END OF THREAD

Thank you so much for reading through and sticking with me.

If you'd like to support me through this rough time it's so greatly appreciated. Help would go towards everyday expenses like travelling, food, and childcare costs.

Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/ducc
Throne: throne.com/ducc

💛🦆

F) If you feel you need proof to believe any of these points that I have made, please DM me, and I will talk things through with you with relevant, suitably redacted screenshots as they contain real names, faces, and numbers.

E) I am keeping replies limited/off on these posts. Too many notifications gives me anxiety. Am so grateful, don't get me wrong, I've just gotta try and protect my brain the best I can.

D) So, to summarise content creation;

1) ASMR channel will take as much priority as I can give it.
2) Art on ko-fi (static art will always stay PWYW).
3) Occasional stream, perhaps, when life eases up on me.

C) Ko-fi shop: I have recently drawn so many new emotes to upload to the shop. They will be uploaded as soon as possible, hopefully over this weekend. Ko-fi is also the best way to support me. Follow me over there to be one of the first to see the new shop uploads.

ko-fi.com/ducc/shop

B) I want to focus on my ASMR channel. This way I can still create, but take my time recording and editing with no strict schedule. I'd greatly appreciate it if you'd subscribe.

youtube.com/@moonbirdiea...