【Links & Things】

🗡️Twitch: twitch.tv/drythe
📜YT Vods: youtube.com/@drythevods

🎨: #drythemedia

bsky.app/profile/dryt...

I don’t really have anywhere I’m going with this and I’m not sure why you’re reading this still, just that I needed to put this out there and maybe try and hold myself accountable.

Streams will continue and I don’t plan on going anywhere because this is all I have

Thank you for reading

I don’t really know what I wanted to accomplish by posting all this because I know people will message me after expressing concern and my first thought will instantly be

Would you have messaged me if I didn’t post this

But that’s something I need to work on and get through

So I put on a mask and pretend everything is ok because when I am anything but happy people leave, who wants to watch someone depressed right? But I’m not ok and haven’t been for a while

To go back and reexamine everything I do wrong every day, to try and find some reason that people don’t like me.

This focus and spiral of negativity is a loop I’m stuck in and even identifying it I can’t stop myself from continuing to think and feel that way.

I’ve put more pressure on myself to stream better, to make the number higher, because if my stream has higher viewership people will like me and I can make friends.

And all this has done is make me anxious at any small hitch in my streams, to place unrealistic expectations on myself,

Im choosing to post this here instead of talking to someone because I have this belief no one wants to hear it from me and I’ve long since convinced myself of this.

All these thought have bled into my streaming activities and have been degrading the quality of streams

I’m aware that you are thinking this is in my head and it’s not true and I want to believe that but my brain can’t stop thinking and over examining everything I do wrong when I talk to people. From the smallest change in their tone, the differences in responses, to a single word they chose to use.

I used to be fine with this and it never particularly bothered me but over the last year it just feels like I can’t keep that up anymore but I’ve long since ruined most chances to connect with people I know and now it feels like I don’t even know how to interact with others genuinely anymore

I don’t want to say something like I’m fine and better now, because that’s not how these things work. I can say I’ll be seeking professional help again

I’ve been struggling with loneliness and the thought that people just don’t like me.

Wait that's clean as hell!

If only we bought more mangosteen

Holy shit for only one million dollars I can own a part of history of a dead internet forum

A steal truly