i love this city

yeah dick is good but have you ever had a big sexy bear pressed against the entire length of your body with his arms around you while you bury your face in his chest and weave your fingers through his fur

2:31am going back for more bear

not always the most useful ability, last winter i had a burst pipe because i couldn't suck dick fast enough to keep that part of the house above freezing but one of my clients did give me a $200 armani tie that i was never going to wear lol

i firmly believe that on some metaphysical level this event infused in me the ability to acquire nice things even when i can't afford them

now to be fair those were prize winning pheasants that my grandmother ran over so it was fancy roadkill but still

in case anyone was questioning my trash credentials

do i have to pick just one

lol. see this is why i like you