I've been trying to sort through all the pain and hurt and find what it is I really like/love, and if there's a way to do that and to just be *me* and not be consumed by doubts and bad memories.

I'm going to keep trying.
I think my passion has to come with a reason, at least.

Thank you so much, Kat. I miss talking to you and hearing your thoughts too...! If I thought I could take it, I would return to the Nexus server in a heartbeat but right now...

...Even without that old audience of friends and followers, maybe getting some of these thoughts off my chest will help...even a little? And maybe I'll be hungering to say it less on the inside if I just *say* it now?

I think leaving was the right thing but damn do I miss it...!

...I already know I'm madly craving the attention I used to get for doing things like this. ^^;

That, lonely as I might be without those familiar voices sending little hearts my way for every rushed stroke of my pen, this kind of 'thing' is just feeding a bad addiction.

But maybe...

And I find I'm still massively under the sway of my needier, more childish emotions even now, else I wouldn't be here posting this "tumblr-esque" decompression ramble about an ultimately minor blip in the fabric of the Kirby fandom that everyone but me has already moved on from...

I *dreamt* of doing more with it. Animatics and such. Maybe spread my little Dark Matter Swordsman theory around some more...? But I was dreaming too lofty.

I got over-invested. The rush of sharing. The interactions. The likes. I truly did feel like a *novice*

...Not at art, but at the *internet*

...I put a lot of work into it. A lot of heart.

I don't know where this is going. Do I feel regret for deleting everything? Possibly. I know that at least for *that* week, I was in so much emotional distress I couldn't bear to stay.

Not like my AU would have gone further than it did though...

Thanks to Air Riders, there's actually a canonical "Noir" in Kirby now. He's cool and edgy yet sweet and pitiable - everything I tried to make my Noir out to be...

I love the new Noir but the more I see that name around, the more sad I get. My little AU was always just a fan story but...

One silly, mostly unnecessary story (that I actually thought the "someone" in question might be happy (!) to see as opposed to object to it to the degree they did ^^; ) and I destroyed years of my own precious content.

But...I don't know... Maybe it was for the best...?

Your Chingaling is sooo cute! 🥰One of my favorite Poke too!

Also 👀 at that hack….

突然感想を置くのを失礼いたします！

NiGHTSの記念日でしたか…！覚えるのは心に残る夢と希望を具現化したのようなBGMやEDソング。あと、懐かしさ故か、NiGHTSの自由にそらを飛べる感覚は今でも大好きです！

いつもゲームの思い出をお書きくださり、ありがとうございます！

✨She looks so elegant with her hair half down! And fantastic job on the floral bits! Hydrangea sleeves!😍 Perfect for the summer season, and I can just imagine how beautiful this will look in color!

That's honestly a great way to think about it. And even though the XKCD comic is hilarious (as most of them are) I agree with the idea of using that ranking as a measure of how much growth there is ahead of you...! (In a positive way ofc!)

初リプ失礼します。あの時代のゲームよくプレイしたのですが、「スパルタンX」の名前に見覚えがなくと思っていたら、アメリカでは”Kung-Fu Master”でしたか！懐かしいゲームです。でもタイトルの違いからはもう、違うジャンルなんじゃないかって思います！