Matt Dylan
@derekflab.bsky.social
Proud former member of the Deep State.
You people should really be nicer to our favorite President, DJT.
October 19, 2025 at 1:46 AM
You people should really be nicer to our favorite President, DJT.
If I was a politician and some fake news reporter asked me what my favorite Bible verse was, I’d pick something from Solomon.
October 18, 2025 at 2:59 PM
If I was a politician and some fake news reporter asked me what my favorite Bible verse was, I’d pick something from Solomon.
If you are disappointed the rapture didn’t happen, you’re wrong and you have a different reason to be disappointed.
September 25, 2025 at 4:23 PM
If you are disappointed the rapture didn’t happen, you’re wrong and you have a different reason to be disappointed.
If by some wild chance a Democrat becomes president in 2029, the Supreme Court will get a bad case of vertigo reversing themselves so fast.
September 9, 2025 at 9:16 PM
If by some wild chance a Democrat becomes president in 2029, the Supreme Court will get a bad case of vertigo reversing themselves so fast.
I’m considering combining my DOGE rebate check with my tariff rebate check to buy a big American pickup truck.
August 3, 2025 at 6:32 PM
I’m considering combining my DOGE rebate check with my tariff rebate check to buy a big American pickup truck.
Here’s a rule for all politicians. When something bad happens, don’t tell me who is to blame. Tell me what positive steps you are taking to fix it.
July 6, 2025 at 8:32 PM
Here’s a rule for all politicians. When something bad happens, don’t tell me who is to blame. Tell me what positive steps you are taking to fix it.
No more DEI! (Donald’s Exclusion and Inequity).
June 19, 2025 at 4:59 PM
No more DEI! (Donald’s Exclusion and Inequity).
President Trump is doing such a great job that he deserves a promotion. He should be the next Pope.
April 21, 2025 at 6:59 PM
President Trump is doing such a great job that he deserves a promotion. He should be the next Pope.
If I want to buy groceries, the first I do is go to the grocery store and kick the manager in the groin.
April 4, 2025 at 1:42 PM
If I want to buy groceries, the first I do is go to the grocery store and kick the manager in the groin.
Will the mule notice when he gets hit with a 2 by 4?
April 2, 2025 at 9:47 PM
Will the mule notice when he gets hit with a 2 by 4?
I think I’ll ride my velocipede down to the country store and buy some groceries.
March 27, 2025 at 7:56 PM
I think I’ll ride my velocipede down to the country store and buy some groceries.
Don’t worry about the economy. Republicans have a plan to solve the nonexistent furrie problem.
March 22, 2025 at 11:04 PM
Don’t worry about the economy. Republicans have a plan to solve the nonexistent furrie problem.
Yes, Anthony, it’s good that the stock market is going down!
March 17, 2025 at 12:46 PM
Yes, Anthony, it’s good that the stock market is going down!
I guess if you have a small stick you learn to speak loudly.
February 17, 2025 at 10:01 PM
I guess if you have a small stick you learn to speak loudly.
Bought a dozen eggs yesterday for $8.99. Soon restaurants will be charging an egg surcharge.
February 1, 2025 at 1:50 PM
Bought a dozen eggs yesterday for $8.99. Soon restaurants will be charging an egg surcharge.
Are Canada and Mexico begging for mercy yet?
February 1, 2025 at 1:49 PM
Are Canada and Mexico begging for mercy yet?
These people are so ridiculous you can’t even make jokes about them. I didn’t expect that Trump himself would blame DEI for the airplane crash.
January 30, 2025 at 6:11 PM
These people are so ridiculous you can’t even make jokes about them. I didn’t expect that Trump himself would blame DEI for the airplane crash.
If we get rid of the fire department and police department, not only will we save money but we won’t have any more fires or crime.
January 24, 2025 at 7:55 PM
If we get rid of the fire department and police department, not only will we save money but we won’t have any more fires or crime.
I’m glad that President Trump has signed an order forbidding anyone in the federal government from calling anything disinformation or misinformation. So now nobody in the government, including Trump, can say anything is “fake news “.
January 24, 2025 at 6:50 PM
I’m glad that President Trump has signed an order forbidding anyone in the federal government from calling anything disinformation or misinformation. So now nobody in the government, including Trump, can say anything is “fake news “.
Doesn’t the human pictured on the cover of this month’s National Geographic look like a Klingon?
January 17, 2025 at 8:39 PM
Doesn’t the human pictured on the cover of this month’s National Geographic look like a Klingon?
I can just imagine Bob Uecker saying “We must be in the front row!” to David Lynch while they wait by the pearly gates.
January 16, 2025 at 8:39 PM
I can just imagine Bob Uecker saying “We must be in the front row!” to David Lynch while they wait by the pearly gates.
All Chuck Norris facts are actually about someone else who is too bigly humble to allow his name to be used.
January 9, 2025 at 8:59 PM
All Chuck Norris facts are actually about someone else who is too bigly humble to allow his name to be used.
While CNN and MSNBC are covering Jimmy Carter’s funeral live, Fox News is showing C-list celebrities blaming Democrats for the L.A. fires.
January 9, 2025 at 5:35 PM
While CNN and MSNBC are covering Jimmy Carter’s funeral live, Fox News is showing C-list celebrities blaming Democrats for the L.A. fires.
It’s just terrible that our dear future leader is being slightly inconvenienced by Jimmy Carter’s death.
January 7, 2025 at 10:18 PM
It’s just terrible that our dear future leader is being slightly inconvenienced by Jimmy Carter’s death.
I sure hope that’s it’s not as cold on January 20 as it was for Reagan’s second inauguration. Just think how disappointed the millions of people crowding DC would be if things were moved indoors.
January 5, 2025 at 7:20 PM
I sure hope that’s it’s not as cold on January 20 as it was for Reagan’s second inauguration. Just think how disappointed the millions of people crowding DC would be if things were moved indoors.