David Pattie
@davidpattie.bsky.social
Teaches Drama at University of Birmingham. Scot. And unfeasibly tall.
Written about Beckett, UK theatre, popular music, Eno, Kraftwerk, Velvets, Talking Heads, and why gigs look the way they do.
Written about Beckett, UK theatre, popular music, Eno, Kraftwerk, Velvets, Talking Heads, and why gigs look the way they do.
@realDonaldTrump Because they are SOCIALIST yr best President is gonna sue the COMMIE BBC because they REFUSE to cast Trump in CALL THE MIDWIFE if the very bad BBC WONT LET TRUMP BE A MIDWIFE I will DECLARE WAR on London and Hemel Hempstead THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
November 10, 2025 at 9:46 PM
@realDonaldTrump Because they are SOCIALIST yr best President is gonna sue the COMMIE BBC because they REFUSE to cast Trump in CALL THE MIDWIFE if the very bad BBC WONT LET TRUMP BE A MIDWIFE I will DECLARE WAR on London and Hemel Hempstead THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER
For me it's this, from Alasdair Gray's Lanark. Hobbes' Scotland- and I swear you can see the house I grew up in.
November 9, 2025 at 7:31 PM
For me it's this, from Alasdair Gray's Lanark. Hobbes' Scotland- and I swear you can see the house I grew up in.
Trump's farts 'growing more powerful by the day' says White House.
November 6, 2025 at 6:32 PM
Trump's farts 'growing more powerful by the day' says White House.
Edited changes on my Inside No 9 chapter to work on today. Which means I shall have to rewatch some episodes of Inside No 9.
What. A. Hardship.
What. A. Hardship.
November 5, 2025 at 10:25 AM
Edited changes on my Inside No 9 chapter to work on today. Which means I shall have to rewatch some episodes of Inside No 9.
What. A. Hardship.
What. A. Hardship.
1st November. Local sheep conduct light refraction experiments. Reasons for this as yet unclear.
November 1, 2025 at 12:17 PM
1st November. Local sheep conduct light refraction experiments. Reasons for this as yet unclear.
GET THE BUBBLEWRAP I FEEL INSPIRED
October 28, 2025 at 4:41 PM
GET THE BUBBLEWRAP I FEEL INSPIRED
New Tardis crew announced.
October 28, 2025 at 4:26 PM
New Tardis crew announced.
Stop scrolling and post two characters who bring you happiness.
October 21, 2025 at 9:41 PM
Stop scrolling and post two characters who bring you happiness.
Maria Corina Machado awarded Nobel Peace Prize for her struggle against auithoritarian rule in Venezuela.
Donald Trump awarded Nobel Big Boy Prize for Dealing With It Like A Big Boy And Not Making A Fuss. Prize consists of life-size Lindt chocolate bunny.
Big Boy Prize later rescinded.
Donald Trump awarded Nobel Big Boy Prize for Dealing With It Like A Big Boy And Not Making A Fuss. Prize consists of life-size Lindt chocolate bunny.
Big Boy Prize later rescinded.
October 10, 2025 at 9:25 AM
Maria Corina Machado awarded Nobel Peace Prize for her struggle against auithoritarian rule in Venezuela.
Donald Trump awarded Nobel Big Boy Prize for Dealing With It Like A Big Boy And Not Making A Fuss. Prize consists of life-size Lindt chocolate bunny.
Big Boy Prize later rescinded.
Donald Trump awarded Nobel Big Boy Prize for Dealing With It Like A Big Boy And Not Making A Fuss. Prize consists of life-size Lindt chocolate bunny.
Big Boy Prize later rescinded.
The Cybermen made their first appearance OTD in 1966 #DoctorWho
October 9, 2025 at 7:29 AM
The Cybermen made their first appearance OTD in 1966 #DoctorWho
Today, I am working on my book. I am doing the reference list. I have always been doing the reference list. I will always be doing the reference list.
October 6, 2025 at 8:55 AM
Today, I am working on my book. I am doing the reference list. I have always been doing the reference list. I will always be doing the reference list.
Your own
foldable
Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own
foldable
Jesus
He can be neatly stored
Under the stairs
foldable
Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own
foldable
Jesus
He can be neatly stored
Under the stairs
October 4, 2025 at 7:00 PM
Your own
foldable
Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own
foldable
Jesus
He can be neatly stored
Under the stairs
foldable
Jesus
Someone to hear your prayers
Someone who cares
Your own
foldable
Jesus
He can be neatly stored
Under the stairs
As someone on here has already noted
September 30, 2025 at 12:50 PM
As someone on here has already noted
You know there’s been that strange social media chat about The Rapture and the pure being lifted up to heaven, past few days?
Turns out it’s true. But only for puffins.
Turns out it’s true. But only for puffins.
September 23, 2025 at 2:17 PM
You know there’s been that strange social media chat about The Rapture and the pure being lifted up to heaven, past few days?
Turns out it’s true. But only for puffins.
Turns out it’s true. But only for puffins.
Erm... right. OK. It's Batman Day, apparently, and I was supposed to get the costumes sorted but I misheard and, er, got this cause I thought they said Bantam but hey it's all black and cool and stuff and I bet this chicken could take the Joker easy
September 20, 2025 at 7:14 PM
Erm... right. OK. It's Batman Day, apparently, and I was supposed to get the costumes sorted but I misheard and, er, got this cause I thought they said Bantam but hey it's all black and cool and stuff and I bet this chicken could take the Joker easy
Yeah so what I heard was you watch this haunted youtube clip then a week later you get a text message and then it comes for you
September 18, 2025 at 1:42 PM
Yeah so what I heard was you watch this haunted youtube clip then a week later you get a text message and then it comes for you
Melania Trump impersonates standard lamp in desperate bid to escape husband
September 17, 2025 at 8:30 PM
Melania Trump impersonates standard lamp in desperate bid to escape husband
This story's been withdrawn. The source has disowned it.
September 13, 2025 at 2:13 PM
This story's been withdrawn. The source has disowned it.
This is the newly paved White House Rose Garden, designed to Trump's specifications. He spent $1.9 million. He's got something that screams bank holiday National Trust cafe overspill emergency. Somewhere off camera there's OAPs frantically batching scones.
September 6, 2025 at 12:19 PM
This is the newly paved White House Rose Garden, designed to Trump's specifications. He spent $1.9 million. He's got something that screams bank holiday National Trust cafe overspill emergency. Somewhere off camera there's OAPs frantically batching scones.
Breaking news from the States: Nigel Farage cast as scary baby in film adaptation of Resident Evil Village.
September 3, 2025 at 4:40 PM
Breaking news from the States: Nigel Farage cast as scary baby in film adaptation of Resident Evil Village.
'The Cylons were created by humanity-'
'Gerald-'
'They evolved-
'Gerald-'
'They rebelled-'
'You're embarrassing yourself-'
'-And they have a plan'
'Gerald-'
'They evolved-
'Gerald-'
'They rebelled-'
'You're embarrassing yourself-'
'-And they have a plan'
September 1, 2025 at 10:25 AM
'The Cylons were created by humanity-'
'Gerald-'
'They evolved-
'Gerald-'
'They rebelled-'
'You're embarrassing yourself-'
'-And they have a plan'
'Gerald-'
'They evolved-
'Gerald-'
'They rebelled-'
'You're embarrassing yourself-'
'-And they have a plan'