Famous Charles DickIns classic: An Epstein Carol

The cosplay fatigues are a dead giveaway.

I’ve heard and would love to confirm, that part of WalMart’s onboarding process for new hires is to show them how to apply for SNAP. If true, that falls under the “tell me you don’t care about my food security without telling me you don’t care about my food insecurity.”

Do you know who I’m supposed to contact? Because I’ve not received my Soros signed check yet and I’ve been protesting since the late 1960s.

You’re kidding! Another white guy? Not a drag Queen, brown illegal or trans? I’m shocked. Shocked!

I stood up for him too. I chained up a shit eating dog. And when someone said he wasn’t fit to screw a dead possum, I said he most certainly was.

Broken clock theory.

“Big Pharma is going to be paying you to take drugs!”

But it’s okay to take horse dewormer!

“I love the smell of a fresh diaper in the morning,” Melanoma Trump.

Every accusation is a confession.

*being

When a story of an elephant hunter bring crushed to death in the act is reported, try as I might, I can’t summon any sympathy.

Maybe they wrote sonnets to each other but were embarrassed to reveal that passion. And that was their “beautiful secrets.” Because when I think “wordsmith” the first name that comes to covfefe mind is Ol’ Yamtits Drumpf.

The Huxton Creeper and Bove have never been seen in the same room at the same time.

Of course, you do know what lives in the back of the cupboard, right?

“Crystal Crack CosPlay Barbie,” if I may expand upon your excellent moniker for the puppy killer.