@dansbrain.bsky.social
Me after I eat enough turkey to kill a mule and pretend I'm not upset that the Lions are getting blown out at home to the Packers tomorrow
November 27, 2025 at 2:31 AM
Me after I eat enough turkey to kill a mule and pretend I'm not upset that the Lions are getting blown out at home to the Packers tomorrow
Future history books will write that nobody knew for sure that college marketing graduates couldn't get work, but there were signs.
November 27, 2025 at 2:30 AM
Future history books will write that nobody knew for sure that college marketing graduates couldn't get work, but there were signs.
Are we sure that Mannheim Steamroller isn't just a Christmas version of the Polyphonic Spree?
November 18, 2025 at 2:39 PM
Are we sure that Mannheim Steamroller isn't just a Christmas version of the Polyphonic Spree?
Really going to be flexing the old, "Jeff Epstein? The financier? With the island?" for the foreseeable future.
youtu.be/he4jcFMXFK8?...
youtu.be/he4jcFMXFK8?...
Jim Downey Delivers the Best Intro of All-Time | Conan
YouTube video by Late Night Nostalgia
youtu.be
November 16, 2025 at 2:39 PM
Really going to be flexing the old, "Jeff Epstein? The financier? With the island?" for the foreseeable future.
youtu.be/he4jcFMXFK8?...
youtu.be/he4jcFMXFK8?...
🚨 HOT TAKE ALERT 🚨
Here's the thing with January 6.
I can completely empathize with people who want to overthrow the government because it's completely and embarrassingly failed them. I get it.
But to do so just to reinstall DONALD FREAKING TRUMP illegally into office? F*ck you, truly. Deeply.
Here's the thing with January 6.
I can completely empathize with people who want to overthrow the government because it's completely and embarrassingly failed them. I get it.
But to do so just to reinstall DONALD FREAKING TRUMP illegally into office? F*ck you, truly. Deeply.
November 16, 2025 at 2:29 PM
🚨 HOT TAKE ALERT 🚨
Here's the thing with January 6.
I can completely empathize with people who want to overthrow the government because it's completely and embarrassingly failed them. I get it.
But to do so just to reinstall DONALD FREAKING TRUMP illegally into office? F*ck you, truly. Deeply.
Here's the thing with January 6.
I can completely empathize with people who want to overthrow the government because it's completely and embarrassingly failed them. I get it.
But to do so just to reinstall DONALD FREAKING TRUMP illegally into office? F*ck you, truly. Deeply.
IS SHOHEI BETTER THAN JORDAN?!
Unanimous MVP awards:
Michael Jordan 0
LeBron James 0
Shohei Ohtani 4
Michael Jordan 0
LeBron James 0
Shohei Ohtani 4
November 14, 2025 at 1:24 PM
IS SHOHEI BETTER THAN JORDAN?!
Wild that the same people who created Pizzagate are the ones defending pedophiles now because he's on their side
November 14, 2025 at 1:23 PM
Wild that the same people who created Pizzagate are the ones defending pedophiles now because he's on their side
Real big brain move to get rid of pennies right as we get into the busiest time of year for people to need pennies.
I swear this admission is filled with morons. Big, stupid, malicious morons.
I swear this admission is filled with morons. Big, stupid, malicious morons.
November 12, 2025 at 4:45 PM
Real big brain move to get rid of pennies right as we get into the busiest time of year for people to need pennies.
I swear this admission is filled with morons. Big, stupid, malicious morons.
I swear this admission is filled with morons. Big, stupid, malicious morons.
This is the plot of the next Dan Brown book.
The collab you didn't see coming. 😁
(and yes, this is real.)
(and yes, this is real.)
October 31, 2025 at 11:33 AM
This is the plot of the next Dan Brown book.
The saddest thing about this Graham Plantner stuff is that he was destroyed by the DNC and not Republicans. Schumer & Co. will swap him out with some other boring, out of touch, geriatric Aaron Sorkin side character who will lose to Susan Collins by double digits next year.
Rinse, wash, repeat.
Rinse, wash, repeat.
October 23, 2025 at 11:40 AM
The saddest thing about this Graham Plantner stuff is that he was destroyed by the DNC and not Republicans. Schumer & Co. will swap him out with some other boring, out of touch, geriatric Aaron Sorkin side character who will lose to Susan Collins by double digits next year.
Rinse, wash, repeat.
Rinse, wash, repeat.
The way you know Graham Plantner isn't a real Nazi is because the GOP hasn't started trying to defend him yet.
October 22, 2025 at 5:26 PM
The way you know Graham Plantner isn't a real Nazi is because the GOP hasn't started trying to defend him yet.
Steel City Collectibles charging $700 for a hobby box of WNBA Donruss paper might be a bigger sign of the end times than Donald Trump and that's insane to me
October 20, 2025 at 2:53 PM
Steel City Collectibles charging $700 for a hobby box of WNBA Donruss paper might be a bigger sign of the end times than Donald Trump and that's insane to me
Pretty sure at this point we could have a national "No Pedophiles" protest and half of MAGA would cheer a guy driving a truck through a protest. Screaming about how the there is no pedophilia, but even if there was the Constitution never said anything about pedophiles
October 19, 2025 at 9:32 PM
Pretty sure at this point we could have a national "No Pedophiles" protest and half of MAGA would cheer a guy driving a truck through a protest. Screaming about how the there is no pedophilia, but even if there was the Constitution never said anything about pedophiles
Time for @pftcommentor.bsky.social to finally find out if Joe Flacco is elite
October 17, 2025 at 3:15 AM
Time for @pftcommentor.bsky.social to finally find out if Joe Flacco is elite
Trump administration revoked the visas of 6 people over things they posted online about Charlie Kirk.
So, on their behalf, let me take a moment to say-- as an American citizen-- that Charlie Kirk sucked and anyone fetishizing him posthumously is a fucking weirdo.
So, on their behalf, let me take a moment to say-- as an American citizen-- that Charlie Kirk sucked and anyone fetishizing him posthumously is a fucking weirdo.
October 15, 2025 at 3:27 AM
Trump administration revoked the visas of 6 people over things they posted online about Charlie Kirk.
So, on their behalf, let me take a moment to say-- as an American citizen-- that Charlie Kirk sucked and anyone fetishizing him posthumously is a fucking weirdo.
So, on their behalf, let me take a moment to say-- as an American citizen-- that Charlie Kirk sucked and anyone fetishizing him posthumously is a fucking weirdo.
I feel about this Tigers/Mariners game the same way I feel every day I get ready for work:
Please just put me out of my misery. Make it end.
Please just put me out of my misery. Make it end.
October 11, 2025 at 4:43 AM
I feel about this Tigers/Mariners game the same way I feel every day I get ready for work:
Please just put me out of my misery. Make it end.
Please just put me out of my misery. Make it end.
What a stupid baseball game
October 11, 2025 at 4:34 AM
What a stupid baseball game
I'd call this picture "American Christianity"
I feel like this photo of masked, armed men pepper spraying a pastor protecting his community is going to be a defining picture of this moment in America for a long, long time.
October 8, 2025 at 1:55 PM
I'd call this picture "American Christianity"
Reposted
BREAKING: Our client Mario Guevara, an Emmy-winning journalist detained by ICE in retaliation for livestreaming law enforcement activity, will be deported tomorrow to El Salvador.
Mario and his family are being punished for his reporting. This cruelty is meant to stifle our free press.
Mario and his family are being punished for his reporting. This cruelty is meant to stifle our free press.
October 2, 2025 at 10:42 PM
BREAKING: Our client Mario Guevara, an Emmy-winning journalist detained by ICE in retaliation for livestreaming law enforcement activity, will be deported tomorrow to El Salvador.
Mario and his family are being punished for his reporting. This cruelty is meant to stifle our free press.
Mario and his family are being punished for his reporting. This cruelty is meant to stifle our free press.
Reposted
Every few months now I re-read this "Who Goes Nazi?" piece from 1941 and am blown away by how it captures the people we are dealing with 80 years later.
harpers.org/archive/1941...
harpers.org/archive/1941...
Who Goes Nazi?, by Dorothy Thompson
harpers.org
October 1, 2025 at 11:59 PM
Every few months now I re-read this "Who Goes Nazi?" piece from 1941 and am blown away by how it captures the people we are dealing with 80 years later.
harpers.org/archive/1941...
harpers.org/archive/1941...
Is anyone calling out @apnews.com yet for this trash framing of the issue? Just completely hack writing.
What's next? "Woman Opts to Wear Short Skirt to Bar. Now She Has to Find Way to Not be Raped."
apnews.com/article/demo...
What's next? "Woman Opts to Wear Short Skirt to Bar. Now She Has to Find Way to Not be Raped."
apnews.com/article/demo...
Democrats voted for a shutdown. Now they have to find a way out
Senate Democrats kept their promise to reject any Republican spending bill that didn’t extend or restore health care benefits, choosing instead to force a government shutdown.
apnews.com
October 1, 2025 at 11:41 PM
Is anyone calling out @apnews.com yet for this trash framing of the issue? Just completely hack writing.
What's next? "Woman Opts to Wear Short Skirt to Bar. Now She Has to Find Way to Not be Raped."
apnews.com/article/demo...
What's next? "Woman Opts to Wear Short Skirt to Bar. Now She Has to Find Way to Not be Raped."
apnews.com/article/demo...
Since the guillotine is suddenly all frowned upon like we're some sort of "civilized people," when are we planning the general strike?
I say that if Trump goes through with using the shutdown to fire most of the government workforce, we shut it down for a week and let these rich fucks sweat.
I say that if Trump goes through with using the shutdown to fire most of the government workforce, we shut it down for a week and let these rich fucks sweat.
September 26, 2025 at 12:04 AM
Since the guillotine is suddenly all frowned upon like we're some sort of "civilized people," when are we planning the general strike?
I say that if Trump goes through with using the shutdown to fire most of the government workforce, we shut it down for a week and let these rich fucks sweat.
I say that if Trump goes through with using the shutdown to fire most of the government workforce, we shut it down for a week and let these rich fucks sweat.
Has anyone mentioned that if Republicans had listened to Democrats at any point since Columbine, with regards to gun control, that there's a chance Charlie Kirk might still be alive?
Turns out giving everyone weapons and also a reason to use them might not be the best plan for staying unshot.
Turns out giving everyone weapons and also a reason to use them might not be the best plan for staying unshot.
September 20, 2025 at 4:11 PM
Has anyone mentioned that if Republicans had listened to Democrats at any point since Columbine, with regards to gun control, that there's a chance Charlie Kirk might still be alive?
Turns out giving everyone weapons and also a reason to use them might not be the best plan for staying unshot.
Turns out giving everyone weapons and also a reason to use them might not be the best plan for staying unshot.
Reposted
From performative Mr. Free Speech to tiresome unctuous toady
September 18, 2025 at 4:49 AM
From performative Mr. Free Speech to tiresome unctuous toady
Reposted
A grim reminder: these people will never be satisfied. There’s no point at which they will say “we’ve won, let’s enjoy life.” They will always be looking for someone else to punish, to revile, to dehumanize. They’re empty without that.
September 18, 2025 at 3:04 AM
A grim reminder: these people will never be satisfied. There’s no point at which they will say “we’ve won, let’s enjoy life.” They will always be looking for someone else to punish, to revile, to dehumanize. They’re empty without that.