I agree: debates are set like competitions to be won, which is quite unphilosilophical. I also find interrupting others quite irritating and counterproductive. But I disagree that fascists should be approached with "I'm struggling to understand your point" as that normalises fascism

True. Even though in some indigenous traditions hope is part of transmitting vital knowledge by highlighting past examples of virtuous actions to inform present action. So it could be a form of empowerment, and an interesting exception to the western philosophical tradition.

I'm not sure that hope entails power. Quite the opposite, in fact: hope is powerlessness, and a direct cause of superstition (as per Spinoza's definition). Hope generally rests on uncertain and false knowledge, hence disempowering people. But I agree that hope is irrational.

It's probably more than just a policy problem: targeting middle class moderates and turning your backs on the working class plays into the hands of the right. But perhaps it's not surprising to see that the US elections are basically right wing in-fighting.