Been following you for years now and transed my hecking gender a little less than a year ago
So reading this just makes me realize how much I always gravitated towards people who have that kind of energy that I could vibe with them
Reading this post just made me super happy and wishing you the best!

Yayyy
I'm in the first ten.
Hell ye!

Yay!! ✨✨✨

Absolutely!!
A revolutionary series that really deserves a comeback in a general anime community.

Also is it okay to DM you, cause it'd be super cool if I could go into some spoiler elements and also scratch a decade long itch of discussing my theories with someone else lol

It's okay if not!

I wish I could say more without spoiling stuff to anyone who haven't seen it and might read it, but what I sticked with me all my life is the quote from the director (can't find it now, sadly) who said that "Y'all won't probably get what we're going for in s2, so it's whatever"
AND I FINALLY GET IT!

I remember watching it ongoing.
Truly a torture.
AS IT SHOULD BE.
And I will die on that hill, if I must.

It really is and I keep saying to people that they can only understand the anime version of "Endless Eight" ONLY after they watch the movie.
It's such a culmination of character's breaking points that delivered so perfectly in the anime that even Tanigawa didn't anticipate it probably lmao

I've been lucky enough to watch disappearance on a big screen for the first time and I've read the ranobe half a year before that.
Shaped me as a person, istg

Same goes for you!!
And yeah, it's the coolest thing ever and I cry like a damn baby every time.

Unironically same and I've been calling it my favorite anime for the past 16 years. Haven't changed my opinion since.
Just yesterday I thought of re-watching it for a millionth time just for comfort.

Absolutely same and I'm not even kidding when I say that this is probably the first time someone tells me that they love this series too.
I'm still lowkey obsessed with it lmao

Honestly, subscribed because I saw in your bio that you're making a Suzumiya inspired game (among other things) and then I see "Disappearance" as a fav movie.
You're just so cool.
And I'm just so happy to follow someone who loves this anime as much as I do.

Without falling fully into just "well, other people find this stuff hot, I guess? So I'll act like that"
No! I'm here to find out how the fuck do I make myself hot! Not how to make myself look as hot as others!
And that is actually fucking difficult and in my opinion should be discussed more.
Thanks

...or at least, not what this society perceives as "sexy", but would actually appeal to me
And so I've spent my day, while doing other tasks, pondering the question: what part of my personality is sexually attractive? Because that seems to be the only form in which I'm able to make peace with myself

And now that those contexts or forms of visual cues bear nothing of value to me, it creates an interesting paradox of being in a body that finally feels like mine, but being completely at a loss when attempting to sexualize it in a form that's not appealing to cisheteronormative society...

(with an exception of a shirtless Agent Fox Mulder, of course)
But this is where I realize that while I used to make nudes of myself as a form of connecting to my body, to a certain degree, so much of those nudes were still performative and learned from pornographical contexts...

Kinky contexts of sub/dom roleplay have a different effect on me that's not strictly sexual or leading to sex, but just the mere idea of existing in a context like this excites me and arouses me.
So now, my attraction to other people's bodies is almost exclusively aesthetical.

As of my almost 4th month of HRT, I have noticed my libido and sexuality take a drastic turn for change. And not necessarily in a bad way. Instead of being aroused by visual cues or pornographical settings, I'm now attracted to more fantasy contexts where I can be desired or taken care of...

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