Curtis Schlak
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curtis.schlak.com
Curtis Schlak
@curtis.schlak.com
Certified Book Coach, novelist, new media platform designer
https://curtis.schlak.com
The key to choosing a laundromat is to choose the one with the graveyard.
November 23, 2025 at 1:03 AM
First person to check THE BONE RAIDERS out of my library! No crease in the spine. Fresh new book smell. 100% awesomeness from @realjacksonford.bsky.social.
November 13, 2025 at 5:42 AM
He even made a joke book in tribute to his dad, which is kind of nice, I guess?

Mike Young turned to Diane Young and said: “When I die, sell all my stuff.”

“Why?,” asked Diane Young.

“When you remarry, I don’t want some asshole using my stuff.”

“What makes you think I’d marry another asshole?”
November 6, 2025 at 2:11 PM
And, when I write "shitty clip art," here's one that I think the author made themself demonstrating their drawing ability is just as good as their writing ability.
November 6, 2025 at 2:11 PM
Worst joke book ever. Currently for sale on Amazon for $14.99.
November 6, 2025 at 2:11 PM
October 24, 2025 at 4:06 PM
Students at the Telluride High School are denied the long tradition of smoking in the boys room.
October 12, 2025 at 3:31 AM
"Thankfully," an organization was there to defend against our diabolical influence.
September 29, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Seems there were lots and lots of witches in the area.
September 29, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Fliers denouncing us as Satanists performing human sacrifices started circulating around the city.
September 29, 2025 at 3:30 PM
This headline appeared on the FRONT PAGE of the city newspaper with ten column inches of story that continued for eight more column inches on an interior page!
September 29, 2025 at 3:30 PM
In high school, my friends and I dubbed ourselves "The Secret Fraternal Order of the Tree Druids Society." Being good citizens (and thinking it was funny), we adopted the street outside our high school. Then, all Hell broke loose.
September 29, 2025 at 3:30 PM
Here's that landscape with simulated time-lapse and a crane shot.
September 28, 2025 at 2:46 PM
I LOVE throwing out stuff and starting over with fresh ideas, for real! That landscape I was working on? ➡️ 🗑️. Here's the new one which I like 1000% better.
September 24, 2025 at 9:43 PM
An update from yesterday's artwork for the background of the main scene in the Terraformers Teaser.
September 23, 2025 at 12:17 AM
Repost with your orange art!

Working on the background for the Terraformers Teaser.
September 21, 2025 at 6:20 PM
The Podcast Compels You reviews Splice (2009) now available on your podcast platform of choice!

#thepodcastcompelsyou #horrormovies
August 14, 2025 at 2:38 PM
Interested in writing compelling stories? Sign up for the Disenfranchised Writers' Voices Virtual Writers Summit happening on 19 July 2025! disenfranchisedwritersvoices.net/summitcall.h...
July 10, 2025 at 3:50 AM
I’m honored to be presenting at the Disenfranchised Writers’ Voices Summit.
May 20, 2025 at 12:30 PM