it rly truthfully is like 11 pm when my brain decides it wants to think ab all kinds of fuckery

i’m just pissed off today

this is js me tryna make sense of it all don’t mind me

i just wonder how i went from being such an anxious attachment to absolutely avoidant.

i feel a sense of fear when it comes to someone getting emotional with me, or like being vulnerable with me. and it’s weird because that’s all i used to ever want was to be someone that a person could come to with their emotions, i always wanted to listen and help where i could

todays gonna b shitty

and sometimes i feel like im cursed LOL, like i get too close to someone and they die or they realize i’ve got issues and dip. i don’t blame them, but ive developed a toxic habit of leaving before i get left

i also feel like having experienced a ton of grief so early in my life has shaped me into the kind of person who really doesn’t care for much. like i’m only concerned with the bigger picture

every time i feel an ounce of attachment to someone i run