I don't know who decided the coffee to water ratio is a tablespoon per SIX fluid ounces of water instead of a solid EIGHT-ounce cup like a sane person, but I have never and will never measure that out.

This is why McDonald's couldn't possibly win the franchise wars. Taco Bell would never.

Memorizing when maintenance cleans my work building's bathrooms so I can use a fresh toilet #firsttopee

I need to know at what point I lost the ability to open resealable shredded cheese packages without ruining the resealable feature.