Imagine it giving you a yearly wrapped of all the stats:
"Your cats pissed 1,000 times this year! They are in the top .02% of pissers!"

I dunno is this weird? Does me asking if it makes it weird?! AM I WEIRD!?

You can be an elder emo in spirit though!

I don't make the rules! Just the thumb holes!

The needs thumb holes screams elder emo and I'm here for it.

The people working the post office are either the most helpful humans or are the worst people to have ever walked the earth. There is no middle ground.

My old ass remembers OG Time Spiral releasing hahaha

Time Spiral would be such a good one!

I'm pretty sure it would happen this way:
You would choose which triggers resolve first while holding priority then as long as nothing else happened to mess with those cards, you could then resolve The Masters trigger based on what they did.

I totally get that! It's always a bit jarring when you deep delve into a nerd interest and others kind of go "wait, who what where?"

"Yeah so I play Magic"
Oh like magic tricks?!
"Not even fucking close"