going to prison for repeatedly trying french words in the english scrabble dictionary (“boeuf” works btw) and googling “bleach vinegar” too many times

leslieville value village security guard pacing the aisles with a massive nerf gun from the toy section… hell

first bday present for first-born nibbling: spend weeks making a needle-felted market basket of play food

first bday present for second-born nibbling: hmm this giant sloth stuffy is pretty cool

hey wow this whole time i thought the "gorp" in "gorpcore" was a quirky misspelling of "gore" as in "gore-tex"... i guess sometimes you find out you're wrong

humiliated once again (third time i confess my bike is “imitation-vintage” to a middle-aged guy after he compliments me on my “old raleigh”)

instagram ads keep “introducing the kanken” fjallraven backpack to me like i wasn’t an urban forest school educator to the children of architects and graphic designers in 2018… next they will try to “introduce” me to the k-way, or the kleen kanteen… enough