atp im convinced a lot of my self-loathing thoughts are like.. undiagnosed ocd maybe

the show isn’t my thing but from everything i see im glad the humor isn’t just “xD what if mario was a sperg” 2009 newgrounds

mostly in relation to me not wanting to seem like a 'transfem stereotype' i ended up repressing some of my genuine interests and hobbies. i do feel ive gotten over a lot of the worst internalized transphobia but sometimes the feelings still pop up

i read some study that claimed autistic trans women are more likely to experience female embodiment fantasies than neurotypical trans women and it just re-enforced my anxiety that i might have less control over my thought processes than i realized