I have HOW MANY students this semester???

Me, grading three (3) papers:

I need a break!

Excuse my sticker shock, but I need HOW MUCH just to apply for international visas for a phd-related position?? And the university has decided to help with none of it? This, in addition to flights and accommodation and other moving costs you have to be kidding me

Automatic response: I have too many emails and I do not want the emails. I'm sure you are very capable of handling it yourself. Please stop sending the emails. Also I have forgotten how to read.

(shoutout to the author mxtx for creating a fictional character who does just that)

Hi, yes, great presentation! This is more of a comment than a question: My own work shows something tangentially related but completely dissimilar which I shall now describe in detail. Also, I wonder if you have read work by several authors which I see you haven't mentioned?

Going to tell my mentees to go back to the way they analyzed it last week, then forget I said that and tell them to redo it differently next week.

Might start replying all, just cause.

I'm thinking of entering my academic gremlin stage- Perhaps I AM an imposter, but you didn't catch it in time so it's YOUR problem now

The "I swear I'm not p-hacking, I'm just trying to find a good teaching example" analysis face