do i really have to put a #art

this sucks

nah, the best weapon is the tongue. not in a "the pen is mightier than the sword" way, more in the sense that if you lick your enemies they will probably not want to fight you anymore. victory.

i want the notification feature but only for like, nintendo. i wanna see release dates and trailers for games and that is it i. think caring about some random person you don't know so much that you want to be notifed every time they post is chronically online behavior

i'm not a nihilist, but when i'm deciding What to capitalize! and Punctuate? and Not, i usually just remember i will be Dead someday, and, nobody, Not One Person, not even if i Was Famous which i will Not have been, will give a shit about my usage of grammar.

it’s humbling not having $20 of spending money. WAIT FOR ME BLEED OUT WAIT FOR MEEEEE

NO BUT PLEASE THE 2019 MOON LANDING ANNIVERSARY MARSHMALLOW MOON OREOS ARE SO GOOD AUGHHGHGHGH

block everyone in your contacts you can never get a text ever again you have to keep it at that number

every time i make a joke like “haha this person should be president” or something like that i am immediately hit with the sad realization that they actually WOULD be a better president than the one we have now

there’s no fucking way this is real

well? did you?