RFK Jr speaks about autism like JD Vance handles championship trophies.

I realize I’m dating myself here, but I’m old enough to remember when we had laws.

Why doesn’t Indiana Jones just seek help for his debilitating hat problem?

Happy Patrick Mahomes Day to all who celebrate!

Ye? It’s going to be a nay from me, dawg.

When Alexander saw the breadth of his domain, he paused for a moment. Then he said, “Wow, look, I can see my breadth!”

Sometimes the elephant in the room is the elephant man. And it’s actually not polite to point him out.

If Jimmy don’t eat world can Jimmy still have dessert?

Did you sleep like a little brick underneath the telephone machine?

I haven’t written any jokes about the UHC CEO getting murdered. Sorry to break up your good time, but murder isn’t justice. Some of ya’ll are giving off vibes like the rioters in Joker.

SKOL! (This note is not affiliated with Skoal chewing tobacco.)