Is this hell? Is this divine retribution? Was I a monster in a past life? Is that why you gave me a monstrous form in this one?

This isn't living. This is a tedious prolonged death.

I can't work, I can't study. I can't make art. I can't pay attention long enough to enjoy reading or even video games. I can't reach out. I can't maintain old friendships and I'm too socially inept to make any new friends online or irl. I can't function.

Thinking long and hard tonight about what my aspirations are and what possibilities my future holds and. yeah. Thinking I might just pack it in and actually kms