hey fam, shit kinda sucks rn but I'm doing my best lol

that moment when you have to clock out to go sit outside in the rain and cry for a couple minutes

one year ago today, death took you in your sleep as you tried to fight your demons alone. we still miss you so much every day; but if there's anything I've learned, it's that we'll get through this together. thank you for being so strong for so damn long.

sorry I haven't posted on here much recently. I've been hella depressed and hella stressed but I'm surviving!!

I feel like I'm telling people that the metaphorical noose around my neck is just a fashion statement, so that no one notices how tight the rope has gotten around my neck.

me to myself: okay, fam, we get paid on Friday, but let's not make any reckless or impulsive expenditures!
also me: what if I get a Monroe piercing bc it would be mirrored to the beauty mark I actually have...

also, I need to go through my Twitter and make a list of people I need to try and find on here to follow Dx

fighting the urge to get up for the day now, instead of sleeping 2 more hours so that I actually get about 7 hours of sleep.
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but I could be playing games

here's best girl's current look for the 7.1 patch 🥰

Compassion and empathy are the 2 emotions that drive me, but they also cause me pain and stress. though it would seem easier to navigate the future by removing them, I worry that doing so will make me lose what little plot there is. if I can't connect to others, then what is the point of living?

I'm feeling conflicted on how to proceed going forward. as jaded and apprehensive I feel, I almost want to dissociate myself enough that I stop feeling empathy or compassion, bc then my 2 biggest pieces of emotional baggage would be out of the way; but just bc I can doesny mean I should.

I'm not crying, you're crying...
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oh wait, maybe we're both crying??

Pt. 3: I hope wherever you are now, that you are at peace, and that your demons no longer haunt you. You deserved to live so much longer than you did, so we will do our best to live our lives to the fullest for you; and also to love and take care of others like you always did. Lots of love, Ris ❤️

Pt. 2: Happy Belated Heavenly Birthday Brenna!! idk if there's an afterlife, but if there is, and you're somewhere out there in that big old sky, all of us down here miss you and love you more than we can put into words. You brought light into our lives, even those who only knew you a short time.

Pt.1: I was going to make a post for you somewhere on social media yesterday, but spent most of the day asleep or distracted, and since it's not like you're online or even in this world with us, I guess it doesn't matter if I post it here where no one will really see it bc only you need to see it.

uhhhhhh I don't even know anymore, guys. Just gonna try my best to get through the day each day from here on out, I guess.

I feel like I should post at least something on here, so uh, here's best girl's Halloween glam 😊