Mfs were like “we’re gonna remake an incredibly serious Christmas movie with gonzo and rizzo the rat narrating it and it’s gonna be fucking perfect”

Muppet Christmas Carol got no business being that good

My favorite thing about the post office is how absolutely shitty everything is. Copy machine covered in dust? Yup. Drop off buggy with rust all over it? Yeah. An actual tool chest they use to store all the labels and stamps? Oh fuck yes.

I’m gonna fucking do it

Y’all ever had a shift at work so wild you had to sit in your car in silence for 30 minutes after

Got firehouse subs sending me cyber Monday emails the fuck is wrong with yall

Super excited to see pics of yalls boring ass brown and tan meals tomorrow

There should be a snoopy section in every store so I can stop wasting my time after I find one snoopy item that I need

Since no one on here yet this is where I’m just gonna talk about different ways of killing myself