Another comic in the room went up to Death and asked what joke offended him. Death looked confused and said “Oh, I wasn’t offended. I was just surprised to see him here on the 7 o’clock show when I have plans to see him on the 11 o’clock show at The Ha Ha Hut.”

-Apology to W Somerset Maugham. 3/3

Afraid that Death meant to harm him for an offensive punchline, the comedian ran out the back door, got into his car, and drove as quickly as he could to The Ha Ha Hut, where audiences were more on board for dark humor. 2/3

Prediction: Elon has control of personal data collected by the government. We’re going to get a story about that data being assetized and sold.

Welcome to the Temu version of an empire.

*potties