Dank farrik, Ailey, was it [that] bad?!

[He coughs a little in his haste to ask. With another quick swig, like that's gonna clear out what choked him, he sets his own bottle of something aside, and sighs.]

Alright, if you're about this, hit me with your best. Or worst, depending.

W-well, uh... yeah, I mean, yeah- I'm no slouch.

[He clears his throat - and reminds himself that this guy's been harassing Ailey for days. Get it together, pal!]

I'm a simple man, I'm not askin' for much.

Well, y'know, I could really use a shoulder to cry on, a hot meal, ten credits...

Oh, I'm [incredibly] dainty. I think she broke my heart...

(cue obvious, overdramatic sniffling)

Into it? What, like two people just slagging each other off?

That mean lady over there! I was just mindin' my business!

I'm not [ugly.]

Maybe it's your survival instinct.