The Chicago Genius Herald
LightNews LightNews
banner
chicagogenius.bsky.social
The Chicago Genius Herald
@chicagogenius.bsky.social
270 followers 2 following 36 posts
Extremely real Chicago-style news. https://linktr.ee/chicagogenius
Posts Replies Media Videos
chicagogenius.bsky.social
OPINION: I’m a 12 Foot Skeleton That’s Been Left Out All Year — and NOW I’m Expected To Do My Job?! (Skelly Bonestein, Guest Columnist)

bit.ly/4oaAE17
October 29, 2025 at 7:21 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Chicago Genius Inside ICE: ICE Agent Once Again Eating Combos From Gas Station After Being Turned Away From Chicago Restaurants

bit.ly/4hgX6TT
Chicago Genius Inside ICE: ICE Agent Once Again Eating Combos From Gas Station After Being Turned Away From Chicago Restaurants
BROADVIEW — For the past two weeks, some of Chicago Genius’ bravest 5’6” to 5’9” reporters have been embedded undercover within ICE patrols deployed across our city, to bring you stories from the
bit.ly
October 17, 2025 at 5:49 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Chicago Genius Inside ICE: Several ICE Agents Lost, Wandering Aimlessly on Lower Lower Wacker for Days

bit.ly/4qbbeSq
Chicago Genius Inside ICE: Several ICE Agents Lost, Wandering Aimlessly on Lower Lower Wacker for Days
LOWER LOWER WACKER — For the past two weeks, some of Chicago Genius’ bravest and reddest-necked reporters have been embedded undercover within ICE patrols deployed across our city, to bring you
bit.ly
October 14, 2025 at 3:22 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Hidden Cove Is Closing and Yes – It’s Because You Sounded Pitchy on “Linger”

bit.ly/3JT79C2
Hidden Cove Is Closing and Yes – It’s Because You Sounded Pitchy on “Linger”
BUDLONG WOODS – “You know I’m such a fool for you…” can still be heard, flatly echoing off the empty walls of beloved Chicago karaoke hideaway, Hidden Cove. Neighbors were devastated to learn that
bit.ly
September 12, 2025 at 6:37 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
OPINION: I’m A Badboy Firefly and I’m Back With A Vengeance *(Lamp Ricky, Guest Columnist)

bit.ly/47bFs0M
OPINION: I’m A Badboy Firefly and I’m Back With A Vengeance
NORTH PARK – You’ve probably noticed that me and my boys are back in town. Glimpses of us seen through the trees may have reignited your childhood whimsy and appreciation for the small things in
bit.ly
August 27, 2025 at 6:58 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Coolest New Rooftop Bar Is Just a Roof on Stilts

bit.ly/3USRBjD
Coolest New Rooftop Bar Is Just a Roof on Stilts
RIVER NORTH – Drinking while outside is key to setting our Chicago summers apart from the dreary rest of the year, when all there is to do is drink inside. Replacing the setting for the alcohol
bit.ly
August 5, 2025 at 5:58 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Lucky CTA Rider First to Piss On New Red Line Station

bit.ly/417EnmJ
Lucky CTA Rider First to Piss On New Red Line Station
UPTOWN — Earlier this week Edgewater and Uptown residents celebrated the re-opening of four CTA Red Line stations that had been closed for renovations for nearly four years. The re-openings were
bit.ly
July 24, 2025 at 5:06 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Jesse McCartney To Headline Pride Fest, It’s 2005 Again and ‘Queer’ Is Back To Being A Slur

bit.ly/44zxRq3
Jesse McCartney To Headline Pride Fest, It’s 2005 Again and ‘Queer’ Is Back To Being A Slur
NORTH HALSTED – Grab your skinny jeans and Uggs because the early 2000s are back with vengeance. “Queer” is a slur again and nature is healing! This year we Chicagoans are ringing in Pride Month with
bit.ly
June 21, 2025 at 4:14 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
“Hungry Hound” Steve Dolinsky Leaves NBC For Farm Upstate Where He Can Run Around, Review Restaurants

bit.ly/45A6oq7
“Hungry Hound” Steve Dolinsky Leaves NBC for Farm Upstate Where He Can Run Around, Review Restaurants
STREETERVILLE — Thursday’s NBC Chicago broadcast featured the final restaurant-focused segment by Steven Dolinsky, widely known across the Chicagoland area as “The Hungry Hound,” “The Food Guy” and
bit.ly
May 30, 2025 at 3:02 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Report: Sentient Little Lending Libraries Rebel Against Diet of B-Minus Literature

bit.ly/4mqNPuB
Report: Sentient Little Lending Libraries Rebel Against Diet of B-Minus Literature
EDGEWATER — The adorable box in your neighborhood, decorated like a house with pink paint and white trim, holds a horrible secret. The Chicago Genius Herald is receiving reports from neighborhoods
bit.ly
May 21, 2025 at 7:04 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Chicago Violent Crime Down in All Categories But Social Media Comment Sections

bit.ly/3FgzNuO
Chicago Violent Crime Down in All Categories But Social Media Comment Sections
CHICAGO — This week it was reported that violent crime is down in Chicago, in line with trends of declining crime nation-wide. The only category where violent crime remains historically high is in
bit.ly
May 19, 2025 at 5:52 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Local Woman Discovers Existential Dread Minimizes Greatly When Drinking Beer on Patio

bit.ly/4mkZIlI
May 16, 2025 at 5:42 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Mother’s Day Activities in Chicago That Your Mom Won’t Hate As Much As She Hates Your Apartment

bit.ly/4mq9LWO
Mother’s Day Activities in Chicago That Your Mom Won’t Hate As Much As She Hates Your Apartment
CHICAGO – The biggest “Oh God That’s THIS Weekend?” holidays of the year is fast approaching. Don’t fret because we’ve got the low-down on the best way to spend this Mother’s Day Weekend in Chicago.
bit.ly
May 11, 2025 at 3:46 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
New Pope Stuns Conclave By Requesting Eucharist Chicago-Style
May 8, 2025 at 8:32 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
State Street Bridge Closed for Upgrades, But You Can Probably Still Make it if You Really Hit the Gas

bit.ly/3ROG7MO
State Street Bridge Closed for Upgrades, But You Can Probably Still Make it if You Really Hit the Gas
THE LOOP — On Monday the State Street Bridge was closed for repair work that will last until November or whenever they feel like opening it. While the repairs continue, drivers hoping to get downtown
bit.ly
May 7, 2025 at 3:21 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Pro-Car, Anti-Car Factions Gather in Giddings Plaza for a Rumble

bit.ly/4d3Pz8B
"Pro-Car, Anti-Car Factions Gather in Giddings Plaza for a Rumble." Two angry mobs gather in Lincoln Square, armed with household tools like a shovel and plant trimmers.
May 6, 2025 at 4:04 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Easter and 4/20 Celebrated Simultaneously
April 20, 2025 at 4:22 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Sterling Bay Scales Back Lincoln Yards Project to One Patch of Grass

bit.ly/43Ohze4
Sterling Bay Scales Back Lincoln Yards Project to One Patch of Grass
LINCOLN PARK — Sterling Bay has announced yet another setback in the years-long project to build the proposed Lincoln Yards development in Chicago’s scenic former scrap-metal-and- disused-warehouse
bit.ly
April 11, 2025 at 2:25 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
bit.ly/4jgoJvU

Sun-Times, Chicago Genius Kut Staf, Promiss Same Qality Gournalism
Sun-Times, Chicago Genius Kut Staf, Promiss Same Qality Gournalism
CHICAGO — The famous newspaper Chicago Sun-Times let go twenty percent of their staff. The Chicago Genius Herald bosses also got rid of pretty much everybody. Its just me now. Both papers want to let
bit.ly
April 4, 2025 at 2:34 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Chicago’s 2024 St. Patrick's Day Parade Wraps Up Just in Time for 2025 Parade
Chicago’s 2024 St. Patrick's Day Parade Wraps Up Just in Time for 2025 Parade
The smell of Guinness, the roar of the crowd. There’s nothing quite like the spectacle of Chicago on St Patrick’s Day. No matter the percentage of heritage in the blood, everyone in the Loop enjoying
thechicagogenius.com
March 15, 2025 at 3:54 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Man Whose Entire Personality Is Based on Living in Logan Finds Out He Actually Lives in Avondale

bit.ly/4373QhX
Man Whose Entire Personality Is Based on Living in Logan Finds Out He Actually Lives in Avondale
AVONDALE – One man’s life was ruined today in Chicago. Due to the newly drawn neighborhood map by sociologists at the University Of Chicago, Self-Proclaimed “Loganite” Spencer Hooper, 28, is having
bit.ly
February 21, 2025 at 7:00 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Rod Blagojevich Celebrates Pardon by Robbing Corner Store

bit.ly/41l4A1P
Rod Blagojevich Celebrates Pardon by Robbing Corner Store
ALBANY PARK — After a surprise unconditional pardon by President Donald Trump for Rod “Blago” Blagojevich, the former Illinois Governor celebrated his newly clean slate by robbing a corner store.
bit.ly
February 18, 2025 at 6:51 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Better Late Than Never: Chicago Man Starts Dry January on the 28th

bit.ly/4gnWtFU
Better Late Than Never: Chicago Man Starts Dry January on the 28th
LOGAN SQUARE – To jumpstart the new year on a more health-conscious note, many Chicagoans have opted to dry-out this month. Despite the stereotype of our city being at a constant high ABV, plenty of
bit.ly
January 29, 2025 at 12:15 AM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
Chicago Restaurant Week Kicks Off With Lighting of Ceremonial Saganaki
January 24, 2025 at 9:58 PM
chicagogenius.bsky.social
St. Anthony Hospital Already Reporting Longer ER Wait Times, "Ghost Doctors" Since Dorval Carter Appointed CEO

bit.ly/3PKcbjI
St. Anthony Hospital in Chicago. Inset: Dorval Carter
January 21, 2025 at 3:33 PM