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charliebearbks.bsky.social
Charlie 🐻 Melbourne
@charliebearbks.bsky.social
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~ Queer wh❤️re
~ All bodies over 18 welcome
~ Wurundjeri land | Melbourne
~ CharlieBearBookings.com
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charliebearbks.bsky.social
Text. adult. Despite these experiences, she describes arriving in Melbourne in 1991, at 43 years old, as follows: "It seemed miraculous that, so far from Europe, the culture should be so sophisticated." Sheila has apparently always had a negative relationship with straight s_x, despite claims to the contrary. It's honestly read-it-to-believe-it, so here are some excerpts. Sheila' account of when a uni friend told her about a recent s_xual experience: "I panicked and my brain went out up to the ceiling so that I was separated from and looking down upon my body. I told Ann that I was scared of what was happening and she brought aspirins and started to shove them down Text. "me as if that might help." She has always had a low opinion of men's s_xual ability: "For my first go I chose a medical student as I was concerned that a man would confuse my an_s with my va__na and use the wrong hole, and I wanted an expert on the job." She also fantasises about how, were she a young woman today, she would experience s_xual assault, "I suspect I would not have escaped s_xual assault if I was embarking on a heterosexual career today." Of course, S workers are to blame for this imagined increase in s_xual assault "Fortunately, I was not ra_ed or s_xually assaulted in any way during my heterosexual career, which lasted until I became a lesbian at 28 years. I think this impunity would be harder to achieve Text. "today. Assaults in clubs and discos, for instance, are commonplace now because of the burgeoning industry of pro_____tion." The final thing I learned about Sheila is that she is driven. She has been heavily criticised throughout her career, both from anti-feminists who find feminism itself laughable, and from feminists who (in my opinion, justifiably) feel that her ideas range from concerning to dangerous. She has had difficulty securing book deals, gaining employment in UK universities, been rejected at numerous feminist events, and has been booted out of almost every feminist group she has contributed to.
July 24, 2025 at 3:47 AM
charliebearbks.bsky.social
Text. Sheila's opinions are out there, even when compared to other SWERFs and TERFs. For the uninitiated, her most widespread beliefs include that men are, by default, predatory; that women should, en masse, become political lesbian separatists; that trans feminine people are insane sxual deviants, trans masculine folk are misguided and self-hating lesbians (she does not consider intersex people); that S workers don't know our own minds; and that Isr__l has a right to wipe out Pal______ans. This book was also dotted with many of her more fringe opinions, including that women who've been rap_d should be denied therapy (she considers it to be abusive, pro-men conversion therapy); that men who knit are s_xual fetishists; gay men who desire children Text. are pae____les; s_xual orientation is a choice, and women should choose lesbianism; cis women with vaginismas or any other s_xual issues should be denied treatment; that STIs cannot be transmitted between cis women (like everything else in this list, this is incorrect); that love is a tool of control men use over women, why else would women partner with men?; and that BD_M, k_nk and edgy fashion trends are pro-Na_i. Sheila is self important. The title ought to give that away, really. Trigger Warning is a title you'd expect from a right wing shock jock, not a respected feminist and former professor. Text. Sheila is petty. In the opening chapters of the book she recounts perceived blights that occurred during her childhood, events which would be insignificant in the lives of most other people. She does not play nice with others and has no skills to repair relationships, nor the interest to learn them. Unable to engage with criticism of her work, she jumps straight to ad hominems. Sheila has colonial brain rot, and is frequently racist. As none of this is conscious, however, she fails to see her behaviours as harmful. Sheila grew up a self-described "army brat," spending part of her youth in Germany and Malta, before returning to England. She also spent a year working in America as an
July 24, 2025 at 3:46 AM
charliebearbks.bsky.social
Ooh, yes this is a good collection! I think there have been several books released recently which try and fail to capture what it does ✨
May 3, 2025 at 6:22 AM
charliebearbks.bsky.social
🌶 Hurts So Good: the science and culture of pain on purpose (2021) by Leigh Cowart (they/them) 🌶

I enjoyed this easy read and would especially recommend it to anyone who side-eyes BDSM play. You can find more of my writing at CharlieBearBookings.com
Charlie Bear
CharlieBearBookings.com
May 3, 2025 at 6:13 AM
charliebearbks.bsky.social
I’m hoping this might be a way to engage with you all that I’m more comfortable with than the previous attempts I’ve made while trying to maintain a presence on social media.
We experience pain differently in different circumstances; needle pain feels different if a careless pathologist is rooting around in our arm for a ‘good vein’, we’re completing the ritual of ear piercing, receiving acupuncture, or engaging in needle play with a trusted partner. It’s not so much that these physical experiences are hugely different, but that the emotions and sense of agency that accompany them - in combination with expectations set by cultural narratives surrounding these practices - influence our experience and response to the sensation of pain. Leigh tests this idea; consulting hot chilli enthusiasts, ultramarathon runners, the religious history of self-inflicted pain, as... ...well as participating in the Coney Island Polar Bear Plunge, reflecting upon their former practice of ballet, and their enthusiasm for the M in BDSM. In pointing to these diverse examples of pain on purpose Leigh argues that masochism is actually fairly common, often tied to ritual, and even recognised as an achievement worthy of celebration. Throughout the book Leigh makes a careful attempt to differentiate pain on purpose from pain as compulsive and/or unwanted suffering. Articulating that “Discarding context, boundaries and consent pain is just suffering,” Leigh strongly argues against the pathologisation and shaming often put... ...onto people who practice masochism. They also highlight the sense of accomplishment, mindfulness, and introspection that pain on purpose can bring. At multiple points Leigh noted that participants in pain on purpose events were mostly white. I think some investigation as to why (particular events chosen, racial exclusion, cost barriers etc) would’ve added something to the book. I would have welcomed a discussion of how pain is unequally inflicted upon marginalised groups by the structures we live amongst. Given that Leigh has a professional research background, and that the book's arguments were well supported overall, I was disappointed that... ...the discussion of race was noted on page 71, “There is a deeper conversation that must be had about this [that white settler colonists forcefully prevented Okipa people from practicing an important religious ceremony involving suspension], and as a white person, it will be my job to listen,” and then abandoned. Leigh is frank about their histories of abuse in ballet, self harm and disordered eating. Their writing also includes a handful of grisly descriptions of bodies in pain and exhaustion, as well as extreme body modification. Their personal reflections resonated with my own experiences of unwanted pain and I felt that the grisliness was well balanced with humour, ultimately enriching Leigh’s insights.
May 3, 2025 at 6:13 AM
charliebearbks.bsky.social
Thanks! I hope you find it interesting.
March 29, 2025 at 11:45 PM
charliebearbks.bsky.social
No radio, no problem! You can stream the live broadcast on the 3CR website. If you miss it, a recording and notes will be available on the 3CR website later today.

www.3cr.org.au/streaming
Listen live to 3CR
Get the Community Radio Plus App HERE. 3CR on an App for your phone and elsewhere. Available through the App Store or Google Play.
www.3cr.org.au
March 29, 2025 at 3:38 PM