Celia Rivenbark
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Celia Rivenbark
@celiarivenbark.bsky.social
280 followers 59 following 35 posts
Country girl turned journalist, book writer and chief cook at Celia Dishes, a snarkfest focused on politics and pop culture. Ima make you laugh through this administration if it kills me.
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A Day in the Life of History’s Dumbest (And Meanest) President
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A Day in the Life of History’s Dumbest (And Meanest) President
5:30 a.m.: Begin day by checking out installation of concrete slab that has replaced iconic Rose Garden beloved by generations.
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August 5, 2025 at 2:38 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
Dr. Oz Must’ve Borrowed His Pal Bobby’s Brain Worms
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Dr. Oz Must’ve Borrowed His Pal Bobby’s Brain Worms
I’ve been so busy lampooning the highly lampoonable RFK Jr., our Laughably Awful Health and Human Services director, I confess to not paying much attention to his Equally Terrible Sidekick, Dr.
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July 15, 2025 at 9:31 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
Elon/Trump: Time for the Great Creamsicle Smackdown
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Elon/Trump: Time for the Great Creamsicle Smackdown
Also, What’s Up with Social Security?
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July 9, 2025 at 3:24 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
Thom Tillis Finds His Balls But Can He Find Ted Budd?
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Thom Tillis Finds His Balls But Can He Find Ted Budd?
Click below to listen!
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July 2, 2025 at 12:26 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
MAGA Careth Not for "Just a Dick" Vance
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MAGA Careth Not for "Just a Dick" Vance
Hear me read it here:
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June 27, 2025 at 3:34 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
Trump Mobile Kicks Off With a Whimper, Not a Bang
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Trump Mobile Kicks Off With a Whimper, Not a Bang
Over the weekend, Donald Trump’s dunderheaded sons, Don Jr.
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June 18, 2025 at 2:15 PM
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Break Up Advice for Donald and Vlad
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Break Up Advice for Donald and Vlad
I’m not saying Trump has locked himself in his Mar-a-lago bedroom to listen to Taylor Swift breakup songs and binge chocolate bars but how else do you cope when you realize the person you loved more t...
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May 26, 2025 at 6:24 PM
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Don Jr.'s Awful But Daddy's Still the Worst
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Don Jr.'s Awful But Daddy's Still the Worst
Hey fam…honestly, I was all set to dish on something completely different today but when I read Don Junior’s comments about Joe Biden’s prostate cancer diagnosis, well, I lost my poo.
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May 20, 2025 at 3:14 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
Don’t Worry! Trump “Dolls” Could Save Christmas
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Don’t Worry! Trump “Dolls” Could Save Christmas
Hey y’all.
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May 2, 2025 at 5:52 PM
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Puppy-Killer Gets Her Purse Stolen; All Y’all Say “Waaaaaah”
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Puppy-Killer Gets Her Purse Stolen; All Y’all Say “Waaaaaah”
Homeland Security Chief and legendary puppy-slayer Kristi (“Kristi”) Noem had her purse stolen while eating at Washington, D.C.’s Capital Burger restaurant on Sunday night.
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April 22, 2025 at 2:06 PM
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Did J.D. Vance Kill the Pope? Don’t Be Crazy!
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Did J.D. Vance Kill the Pope? Don’t Be Crazy!
Like many of y’all, I woke up this morning to the sad news that Pope Francis had died.
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April 21, 2025 at 7:00 PM
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Space Cadet Celebrities Should Get Over Themselves
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Space Cadet Celebrities Should Get Over Themselves
If you need more proof that rich people aren’t like the rest of us, consider three female celebrities put on their Barbie Astronaut outfits and were blasted into space Monday aboard Jeff Bezos’ Blue O...
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April 16, 2025 at 8:57 PM
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Interior Secretary Orders Staff to Bake Cookies (and that’s the likable part about him)
(If you prefer listening to today’s post, click the audio file below)
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April 11, 2025 at 10:37 PM
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Breaking Down Trump’s Weird Fixation with “Groceries”
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Breaking Down Trump’s Weird Fixation with “Groceries”
I just shoved a batch of stuffed peppers into a preheated oven a few minutes ago.
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April 8, 2025 at 1:32 PM
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Celia reads ... HAPPY LIBERATION DAY TO THOSE WHO CELEBRATE
Hey y’all - I figured out how to post my Substack as an audio post!
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April 2, 2025 at 11:56 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
HAPPY LIBERATION DAY TO THOSE WHO CELEBRATE
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HAPPY LIBERATION DAY TO THOSE WHO CELEBRATE
Happy Liberation Day, y’all!!!!
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April 2, 2025 at 10:51 PM
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mobilize.us/s/cl7FYa
Hands Off! Wilmington Fights Back · Hands Off
**Donald Trump and Elon Musk think this country belongs to them.** We are fighting back! They're taking everything they can get their hands on—our health care, our data, our jobs, our services—and da...
mobilize.us
April 2, 2025 at 1:34 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
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Scandals, Trump’s Portrait Meltdown and A Picture You Will Never Forget
With all that’s happened in the news the past few days, it’s hard to know what to talk about first.
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March 28, 2025 at 12:36 PM
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Elon’s Cryin’ About Those Mean Ol’ Democrats
Elon Musk, who has frequently and nauseatingly spoken out on the “dangers” of being empathetic to others this week, whined about his mistreatment by Democrats whom he always thought were the nice guys...
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March 22, 2025 at 4:53 PM
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Whoppers With Cheese—Trump’s Lie-Fest Didn’t Go Down Easy
Whoa.
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March 5, 2025 at 8:29 PM
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Important Update from Celia Dishes
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Important Update from Celia Dishes
Hey y’all,
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March 4, 2025 at 6:39 PM
celiarivenbark.bsky.social
Republicans Use Their Kids As Props While Poor Families Suffer
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Republicans Use Their Kids As Props While Poor Families Suffer
Something has been nagging at me when I see all these male Republican politicians parading their babies and young children around like, “Lookit me!
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March 4, 2025 at 6:39 PM
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Vance Turns Into Prissy Ol’ Granny With Repeated Demands for Thanks
J.D.
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February 28, 2025 at 9:40 PM
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Only Lame, Unqualified Reporters Will Cover Lame, Unqualified President
Tuesday’s announcement that Donald Janelle Trump will personally select all the members of the press corps that covers him has left Kremlin, er, White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt breathing ...
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February 26, 2025 at 9:11 PM
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celiarivenbark.substack.com/p/regrets-tr...
Regrets? Trump Supporters Have Had a Few…
I’d been waiting for this moment since shortly before midnight, November 5, 2024.
celiarivenbark.substack.com
February 19, 2025 at 7:46 PM