#SuperMarioGalaxyMovie #TheSuperMarioGalaxyMovie #MarioGalaxy #Rosalina #MarioMovie2 #MarioMovie

I know there are people out there who do like me for who I am, and will like me for who I become as I continue to unmask. But for now it is nice to be able to choose the people I care about and choose to be able to hold onto them without being mistreated in the process.

But it’s nice to care about someone without consequences, it’s nice to be able to appreciate people without worrying that if I don’t put all of my effort into putting on the right performance I may lose them. Masking is a bitch and unmasking is an even bigger one.

in my daily life. In reality, it’s nice to know that I cannot disappoint the other party involved. That nothing I can say or do or NOT do would cause their stories, their mannerisms or their families to exit my life. I fully acknowledge that it’s parasocial, that we are not and wouldn’t be friends.

As someone who is a bit distant from my extended family, it is nice to be able to delve into a world such as Mythical, where Rhett and Link talk about things like their wives and kids. Link’s podcast with his father where they get updates from his grandma fills a hole for that kind of conversation

Being able to pause/play something like a podcast is really nice for when I want to do my usual analyzing of mannerisms and stories and things people I care about say, while also not having to worry about the social consequences of leaving early because my social battery is drained.

I also do have someone who I feel connected with in a way that has stopped that “chase” for me currently. But while I am building my trust in others, I feel leaning into the worlds of these YouTubers is a really nice tool for me to have my social needs filled in a way that avoids a lot of “conflict”

That I have been desperate for my entire life, and I’ve thought I’ve found it multiple times, and it’s fallen through multiple times. I have not given up hope in its entirety. I think it is pertinent to choose to have hope as an autistic person because the world can feel against us socially.

Some of my favorites off the dome: Rhett & Link, Dan and Phil, Trixie and Katya, Mark and Bob and Wade, Smosh, Legends of Avantris. Notice a theme? Long term friendships just having banter on the internet. LOA fits the D&D scenario to a tee. The others represent a sense of deep connection

However, expressing that love in a way that is conducive to friendships with most people doesn’t necessarily come naturally to me. For now, some trust issues are to blame, both in others and in myself.

So for now, I find a lot of comfort in YouTubers who allow me to experience a similar dynamic

could feel casual to most people, but to me held so much significance. When I was there on the sidelines watching, I was silently appreciating every person I was interacting with. I love people, but I struggle to socialize with them. This has always been my struggle. But loving people is easy for me

The amount of friendships that I held onto as if they were for life, unquestioning in my willingness to unmask and trust the other people, only to one day wake up and realize they had been disengaged from me for months, sometimes years, is haunting. But I do see how those sorts of friendships

To me, this felt almost like a symbiotic relationship. It felt perfect, but looking back I realize people saw me as so and so’s partner, and probably didn’t see my presence as a bad thing, but they definitely didn’t see it as a significant thing. At the very least, not as much as it was for me

I loved laughing alongside the role playing aspects and being able to zone out when the social aspects were too much. I didn’t have to let down the group if my social battery was too low because I didn’t have to be present for the game to occur. I could help out by getting pizza for everyone.

Yes I am capable of it because social norms require me to be able to, but I rarely feel like myself when I enter a social interaction without having set some sort of intentions for what I want to say. A lot of the hang outs I miss most are when I sat on the sidelines of others’ tabletop RPGs.

I like listening to stories and fully absorbing myself in them, and for me a part of engaging in the typical flow of conversation involves having to split my attention between what the person is saying and scripting my next response. Talking “off the dome” doesn’t really exist for me.

recently I realize pretty immediately that I actually enjoyed being a bystander to a lot of the conversations happening. First of all, I’m a big listener. I like watching people’s facial expressions and mannerisms, especially if I care for that person the pleasure in that is elevated.