I had what I think is my last face laser on Monday. (Might need one more for a few stubborn hairs on my lip) I cannot get over the difference between the the 1st session a year ago and now. Granted it's also 4 months of HRT but still. Also even at my age I get teased for my dimples >.<

I... Wish I was any good at accepting compliments. My girlfriend keeps singing my praises. To me, to others, all the time. My imposter syndrome butt fights it every time. It whispers how she'll realise the truth soon enough, the illusion will shatter.

The difficulty of really wanting my chest touched (especially since my partner is visiting from abroad) but it being very painful if more than surface level pressure is applied at the moment. I know it's a sign the hrt things are going on but darn it!

I've been dreaming so often recently, I used to vividly dream once a month but now I'm almost constantly dreaming.

Last night I dreamt I met up with an old family friend I haven't spoken to in years. We sat down and played a board game about growing trees with some very elaborate standees.

I dreamt last night that I went back to my late teen years, my childhood bedroom. Before one of the moments that changed my life and mindset. I immediately told my parents I wanted to transition, and I needed to stop trying to force myself down a road that didn't work for me.

One slightly annoying change with my skin is that I can't shave without using foam/gel anymore or I get razor burn on my upper lip no matter how careful I am. Fortunately a few more laser sessions and I shouldn't need to anyway.

To all those out there trying their best, I'm proud of you. It takes a lot out of you to struggle against adversity day after day, especially at the moment.

I always have time for anyone making an effort.

I maxed out the weight on the head squisher this morning (100kg on the adductor and abductor), wondering if any exercises can push those muscles harder or if I just train endurance now.

Week 3.5 of HRT:
Imposter syndrome vs gender dysphoria, no items, fox only, final destination.

You don't have to give the raichu head pats, but she does appreciate them.

Update after 1 week of HRT:

Mood has been pretty positive. Can't say I've noticed much change there except a massive weight being off my shoulders.

Physically... My skin does feel better actually huh.

Every day from here is a step towards becoming my ideal me, and I like this energy.

I guess my birthday is also my re-birthday now, That makes it easy to remember I suppose.